I will cut to the chase and be as frank and honest with myself and all you good people as I can be. I will sound like Im ranting here but I think I need to get this off my chest and clear the slate before starting my journal. Theres no point cheating yourself in your own journal....right?
I currently weigh 146kg (320 pounds) and am suffering from a range of issues. I do have insulin resistance (no diabetes at this stage thankfully but I sure am in the firing line), I suffer from gout, my blood pressure is up and my lower joints always ache because of the weight being forced on them. I am currently prescribed a daily medication to stabilise my uric acid levels as well as medication for my insulin resistance. Of course, being careless, I dont take them and then pay the price when Im in pain from gout or whinging about how ugly and out of shape I feel.
I always thought that I was not "that far gone" mainly because I led a pretty decent social life, had no real dramas with the ladies, wore decent clothes and so forth. That illussion clouded the real problems. Sure, on the surface I was confident and outgoing and the life of the party but come home time, if I was alone, I would feel absolutely miserable and would hate myself.
Ive learned that comparing yourself to others is always going to be a problem, particularly if someone has a completely different genetic make up. Ive been reading Tom Venuto's book "Burn the fat, feed the muscle" and have taken some good points from it. One of those points is to set goals, daily goals, weekly goals, monthly goals, quarterly goals, a yearly goal and then an ultimate goal. Ive read that if I can better myself each day, then I am achieving a goal. Quite simple in theory, but Ive never thought of it like that or put it into practice.
My problem has always been that Ive started and then stopped my "lifestyle changes". To be honest, they were never "lifestyle changes" but more so quick fixes I thought would make me happy and get me to where I wanted to be. Truth is, I never had a clear picture, a clear plan or clear commitment. Consistency always lacked.
Now Im back again, with the aforementioned health problems knowing that I need to make some changes and improve my life. Last Saturday, I had an attack of gout in my left foot and for the whole day was laid out. Yeh, it was my fault, I got lazy with taking my meds, I ate the wrong foods, I had no one to blame but myself. It was also the night I just thought to myself, "screw this". I figured I cannot let these conditions and my weight dictate my life any longer.
Im 34, will be 35 in about 8 months. Ive been overweight my whole life. In 2004, I weighed about 160kg and lost some good weight through sheer hard work and eating right, so I do know what I need to do, but this time,I want to do it right and keep things going.....the lifestyle change Ive always sought.
Im engaged to be married, Im lucky to have 2 weddings,one in Australia in March and then another overseas in August. I work in a professional field, Im self employed and am flexible with time. Unfortunately, Im always in the office but the thought of being able to train anytime always appealed to be as a self employed man. No, I never took up that opportunity.
So here I am today, Ive laid it all out on the table.
I dont want to piss in anyones pocket, but I do like this site and this forum. John Stone, what you have done with this forum is inspirational, your success is inspirational. I know that, by posting here, I will be accountable to all you good people and will have the support which I believe is vital.
I know it all starts with me and Im happy to say Ive set some goals and have started on my road to recovery, my road to health, my road to a comfortable life without the burden of obesity. No more excuses, no more "i did this once, or could have, should haves, would haves", no more it starts tomorrow or Monday.
It all starts now, I wont shoot myself if I skip a meal or eat the wrong thing or miss a workout, I will progress and just keep going.
So for my goals. My ultimate goal is to be lean and muscular and able to purchase clothes off the rack freely.
My yearly goal is to reach 100 kilos (220 pounds) so thats a 100 pound loss.
My quartery goal for March/April is to reach 135kg and have the consistency in place which is necessary to achieve my goals.
My daily and weekly goals are to improve on the day before, be it a workout or eating right and to maintain my consistency.
I will come back and review these goals throughout this journal.
I have read the stickies and have the assistance of a dietician for my meals.
I will not be training at a gym as I have collected a fairly decent arsenal of equipment over the last 2 years. I currently have a treadmill, a weights bench with a pulldown attachment, a bench press bar, a curling bar and a few sets of different weight dumbells.
This week Ive already completed 3 cardio sessions of 30-45 minutes which have got me back into the frame of mind for exercise. I have bettered myself in each session. The legs had not really worked for a while so thankfully the cobwebs are clear.
I will post a more detailed breakdown of my diet and exercise in the coming days.
Thanks for reading guys.