Anyone else dread social events with food? I don't mind cheat days on the biggies (thanksiving, etc) but I hate feeling obligated to eat junk at social events. This weekend, I'm going to an engagement / 4th of July party cookout. I'll eat chicken, veggies, but I always get peer pressure to eat dessert or other junk.

Anyone else have this problem? Any successful coping strategies?
Happy Fourth!

Anyone else dread social events with food? I don't mind cheat days on the biggies (thanksiving, etc) but I hate feeling obligated to eat junk at social events. This weekend, I'm going to an engagement / 4th of July party cookout. I'll eat chicken, veggies, but I always get peer pressure to eat dessert or other junk.

Anyone else have this problem? Any successful coping strategies?
Happy Fourth!

I used to have that problem. It was related to all areas of my life - felt obligated to punch into a nine-to-five job for security, felt obligated to eat at social events, etc.

It was all fear of acceptance and worrying too much about what other people think instead of focusing on ME and doing what I want and being who I deserve to be.

Once I got over that, I stopped worrying about everyone else. Now, I choose what I want. If I'm going to splurge at an event, fine. But if I choose to eat healthy that day, I don't feel obligated for anything - someone asks me if I want the hot dogs, I say no. They tell me I'm crazy or too obsessed with my weight? I smile and let them know how the hot dog might taste great for about 2 minutes but seeing my abs in the mirror gives me a satisfaction that lasts all day long.

You said it yourself - peer pressure. Stop falling into line, and letting someone else think for you. Suck it up, be yourself, and do what YOU want to do. Set a trend. I remember getting teased at work when I started eating healthy, and would bring a shake to drink while everyone else munched on cake at the birthday parties. After a few months, those sneers turned into people walking into my cubicle and sheepishly asking me if I could help them make the changes in their lives that they witnessed happen in my own. Next thing you knew, we had a whole department waiting in line to heat oatmeal in the microwave to eat with their hard-boiled eggs. Go figure!

Jeremy

I'm used to this. It is my day-to-day life.

Most importantly, Jeremy said it all - be yourself and be damn proud of it. Confidence in yourself and what you're trying to accomplish will do wonders to keep at bay those who'd criticize you. It will also do wonders for your program. I think my best gains have come not as a result of simply showing up at the gym regularly, but as a result of discovering the power of what the mind can do when it truly believes in something.

Many times when I was losing my weight, somewhere in the back of my mind, a voice was there... whispering... and it would say to me, "this will just be another failed attempt. You'll be fat when it's all over. And you'll have missed all this good food and good times because you tried and failed." I kid you not... somewhere in my subconscious was a fat-little know-nothing trying to undermine me. Either that or I need psychiatric evaluation. Well, I need that anyway... :P

After a while... the many opposing forces no longer upset me. They didn't slow me down. They didn't even bother me. It was like my resolve had become a Teflon coating and whatever anyone threw at me couldn't stick. I was going to succeed where my friends, my family, and my co-workers would have had me fail.

And so I have achieved a great deal because of my newfound belief in myself... with a little more work to do yet, but within spitting distance of at least one of my ultimate goals. I have a post coming along, hopefully tonight... if I get home at a human hour, where I'll talk about eating healthy on vacation and get some opinions. But that's for later.

Thanks for the encouraging words.

I should probably give a little more info about me. I've always been fairly healthy and working out has always been part of my life.

It's the nutrition part that is changing for me. Before I ran into this site (so happy I did), I didn't pay any attention to macronutrient ratios. In retrospect I was WAY too short on the protein.

I guess the problem for me is that people think I'm way too serious about the whole thing and that I should relax a little. I AM slightly neurotic about what I eat (who, me??) and people get really stand-offish and offended (maybe it's the misery loves company theme that we saw in the "you're too skinny" thread) that I don't want to "have a good time" (aka eat and drink).

Plus I'm a little stressed about meeting all of these new people...I'm the fiance (hooray!)

Again, Thanks.

Thanks for the encouraging words.

I should probably give a little more info about me. I've always been fairly healthy and working out has always been part of my life.

It's the nutrition part that is changing for me. Before I ran into this site (so happy I did), I didn't pay any attention to macronutrient ratios. In retrospect I was WAY too short on the protein.

I guess the problem for me is that people think I'm way too serious about the whole thing and that I should relax a little. I AM slightly neurotic about what I eat (who, me??) and people get really stand-offish and offended (maybe it's the misery loves company theme that we saw in the "you're too skinny" thread) that I don't want to "have a good time" (aka eat and drink).

Plus I'm a little stressed about meeting all of these new people...I'm the fiance (hooray!)

Again, Thanks.

You'd be amazed at how much of this you project onto others. In other words, your own insecurities are going to play a large role in the response you receive. It is your choice - if you choose to perceive your nutrition as neurotic or different, then what you will project is going to create that reaction. If instead you embrace your lifestyle with confidence and know that it is a path to good health and could be a benefit to share with others, their reaction is going to be ... wow, you are truly disciplined, how did you do it?

I'm serious. I do a lot of study of personality, psychology, and people. It is an important part of personal training, sales, and many other facets of life. My mindset when stepping into any endeavor as an entrepneur has a huge influence on the ultimate outcome ... if I enter with confidence, I step into my own power and produce results. If I enter with skepticism and doubt, then I end up on shaky ground.

Jeremy

jeremy you're a really smart guy. you're knowledge of the human mind and body never seizes to amaze me. This has been extremely inspirational!!

....I remember getting teased at work when I started eating healthy, and would bring a shake to drink while everyone else munched on cake at the birthday parties. After a few months, those sneers turned into people walking into my cubicle and sheepishly asking me if I could help them make the changes in their lives that they witnessed happen in my own. Next thing you knew, we had a whole department waiting in line to heat oatmeal in the microwave to eat with their hard-boiled eggs. Go figure!

Jeremy

That's quality!! I bet you were like, "yeah, go and eat your cake little man!" :tu: