Today is the first day of the rest of my life.

I have waited far too long to begin writing this. This is all improv, no revisions, off the top of my head.

Today I quit smoking. In September of 2003 I quit smoking for nearly 7 months. After that time I met a guy who was smoking and we started up a conversation and I bummed one of off him. I thought I could handle it but I was wrong, and I was stupid. I understand physiological addiction and I can never take another puff. I quit again, and I will never smoke a cigarette again for the rest of my life.

This is the first step in my transformation.

In addition I have started a Max-OT style workout program last week. I am going to build lean mass this summer.

I needed to get this out to the world. Thank you for being here. John Stone Fitness is an excellent site.

My transformation has begun.

:tu: I'm with you! I quit smoking a year ago. Today I can't even stand people smoking near me. I hate the smell and the thought of keeping a cigar in my mouth is... really bad... :d_frown:
I started my program a week ago and all I can tell you is to keep up with the work no matter what! Be strong and keep your eyes in the goal you wish to achieve!
We'll be here for you! :nod:

Well well well...

I last posted in this journal nearly two years ago. I didn't get very far that time. I wouldn't call it a complete failure, though, "What is past is prologue."

Fast forward to today.

I have finally managed to quit smoking. It's been 6 months and 17 days since I last had a cigarette. I am proud of myself. Every morning when I wake up I quit anew by telling myself (out loud) that "I will not smoke today. I will not smoke for the rest of my life." Before I go to bed I like to say to myself, "I am proud of myself for not smoking today." But usually I forget.

As of yesterday I quit smoking marijuana. I will never touch that substance again. I had a lot of fun with weed. Sometimes, it opened my mind in interesting ways and it made me appreciate things in a new light. But more often, it was something I used as a crutch, one which fostered negative thinking. Everybody is different. But for me, marijuana is not the right answer. It never has been and it never will be. If it took me several years to realize this, well, at least I have now.

I have been practicing mindfulness meditation for the past two weeks. I do it every day for 20 minutes and in addition, once a week I meet up with a group of people I know and we all meditate at the same time and have discussions. One of the girls there first introduced us to the world of mindfulness meditation, and she organizes the meetings. It is an interesting thing. I am going to try it for eight weeks straight and then I will consider how it has affected me and whether I wish to continue it.

I have been doing a little bit of jogging lately. Nothing major, but about 4 easy km.

I haven't been doing any weights at all. It's been a while since I did. I would like to get into a routine.

My eating habits are pretty crappy. I need to have some consistency in when and how much I eat. I have a tendency to eat too little or not at all. I love preparing good meals and eating them, but I rarely do so.

My sleep routine is non-existent. I would like to develop a decent routine for sleeping. I am sick of keeping odd and inconsistent hours.

I would like to make some goals in my life.

One is that I would like to stop browsing the web aimlessly for hours on end. I have an internet addiction, plain and simple. But I think that this beast is of a different nature than the weed or the tobacco: this is one I truly can tame and learn to live with. I use the internet for all sorts of beneficial stuff, and using it for a little bit of fun is okay, but I must learn to control my computer use and avoid letting it get out of hand. Hell, I'm a computer science major. I had better get this habit under control :)

This week I will try to come up with some fitness goals. I'm really not sure what I want. I know that I want a "functional" body: one that is good for sports and generally anything. I just want to be in great shape. I have no aspirations to become a bodybuilder or a marathon runner, though I would like to have weights as part of my life and I would enjoy some form of exercise or sport that involves a lot of running around. I want to learn to hackey sack. Also I want to get back into sprinting.

I have to take some pictures of my body and get them up here.

The real reason behind this effort is my unsatisfaction with my direction in life right now. Or more accurately, my lack of direction. I'm 24 years old and I don't know where I'm going. But I damn well intend to figure it out, and it's going to be something which both challenges me and leaves me fulfilled.

Thanks to everybody, especially John, for providing such a positive and powerful inspiration. I can do this, and so can you.

Today I quit smoking.

Hooray. This is the most beneficial thing people can do for their health.

Good luck with the rest of your plan.

Alright, its past time for an update.

So:

Sleep: no change. my sleep routine is pretty crappy! I love sleeping, so I should probably change this.

Meditation: I'm meditating for at least 5 mins right after I wake up and at least 5 mins before I go to bed [for the past couple weeks now] and it's great. I want to keep this up and maybe in time increase my minimum meditation time.

Food: Diet is not improved. I really need to work on this... At least I get breakfast most mornings, which is a MUST for me.

No smoking: Keeping it up :D It's been nearly 2 months since I last smoked MJ, and it's been 8 months+ since I smoked tobacco. I feel good about this. I deliberately reflect on it daily.

My impulsivity is still a big hindrance to my daily life, but I'm making some progress with it. The meditation and some decisions to just start ACTING are probably the key here. I will keep it up, since I have a LONG way to go. I've been able to study for midterms and sit down to meditate, peeling myself away from the computer. I've been able to eat meals. I just can't do them with the regularlity I want. One step at a time. It's coming together.

Fitness: I took a trial TKD lesson a while back and thought I'd get back into it... but it never materialized; I guess a part of me was too lazy to do it. But I've been playing soccer again lately and boy, oh boy... does it ever feel good to be back. I haven't played since I was 21 and I was a smoker then and I played briefly, but before then I was like 17-18 the last time I'd played... Now I'm on an intramural (but competitve) team and we're undefeated and going to the playoffs ... and I organized my first pick up game yesterday... Also me and my buddy M have been going out to the field and playing a couple of times a week, by ourselves or with anybody else who wants to join... It's been fantastic. My lung capacity and stamina is just increasing at a phenomenal rate. I could run 5km without too much difficulty before I started playing again but now I am starting to be able to sprint and jog and sprint and jog and sprint and jog ... and it FEELS GREAT. I notice the difference every morning when I'm late for school and I start running :) Also my vision in game is better (by far) than it ever has been. I think its funny that now that I'm 24 I'm developing into a well rounded player... I still have a long, long way to go with dribbling/ball control and I'm a more than a little disappointed at my tackling ability lately. Tackling was one thing that always came naturally to me but it's lagging behind this time around. I guess I'll give it time. You win some, you lose some. I'm really loving the pre-game warmup though: the stretching is fantastic. I love stretching.

So that's about where I am. I'm really happy with the way things are going.

I just need to start eating and sleeping better, and I'll be pretty happy with where I stand. I want to keep playing soccer for a while now...

I might throw in an occasional once weekly weights session just for the hell of it. Dunno yet though.