For the last six weeks, I've been focusing on how I'd like to look at the beach this summer, and it's not working for me anymore.

I've been cutting back on the foods I love, working out past the point where I'm tired, and trying to find new and improved techniques for my workouts even though I like the ones I'm doing now.

Especially since I posted my photos I've been more concerned about how I look than about how I feel. It felt nice to be noticed for a change. In real life, I'm just a mom, ya know?

Fitness has given me an opening to be different, and this forum has given me an outlet to shout "Notice me!" My husband told me that he's not comfortable with me posting photos. On the other hand, I wish he'd tell me more often that he's proud of what I've been doing for my body and for my health.

My goal for March was to see my abs, and I think I need to rethink how important that is to me. I think it's time to get back to where I was in January and February, and concentrate more on my inner self. I need to do things that will make me feel better instead of look better.

Here are my new goals:

1) increase cardiovascular endurance (make it through the 45 minute jogging program on the treadmill)
2) continue to increase muscular strength
3) eat to nourish my body instead of eat to look good
4) encourage my family to become active with me
5) continue to shift my family's diet to a more healthy one

I'm sort of sad about this decision right now, because part of me really would like to do everything that I can to look like a fitness model for once in my life. But right now, it's causing me to shift my other priorities over to the side, and it's becoming an emotional drain. I hope that somehow I can find a happy medium.

Come on guava! You already have a nice body, a body many teenage girls would envy, so to me, your priorities totally makes sense to me.

Who knows, with the extra energy you'll get, you might even be able to loose more than on a "diet" :tu:

Here are my new goals:

1) increase cardiovascular endurance (make it through the 45 minute jogging program on the treadmill)
2) continue to increase muscular strength
3) eat to nourish my body instead of eat to look good
4) encourage my family to become active with me
5) continue to shift my family's diet to a more healthy one Guava,

None of these goals are mutually-exclusive to looking better. Though you'll be shifting your attention to being healthy, happy, and fit, I think looking great will come as a welcome side effect. Just because you're not focusing your attention on aesthetics doesn't mean they won't improve. Generally happy -> confident -> attractive, so don't sweat it.

Like Duckman said, you already look great. You posted pics and I thought "after?", not "during" or "before" -- honestly.

I like to listen to Foamy ranting about the fat-kins ('http://www.illwillpress.com/fatkins.html') diet when I'm not feeling too great. The part at the end is what really sticks: don't believe that beauty is only found on the cover of a magaznie.

Things went great yesterday. I had my usual breakfast of oatmeal and apple. For lunch a salad of cucumber, tomato, green onion, red pepper, chicken breast chunks and (gasp) thousand island dressing, plus a peanut butter and rasin sandwich on (gasp) white bread. For snacks two gingerbread cookies, coffee, a slice of fat free sugar free banana bread and some canned fruit coctail suspendended in gelatin. For dinner, the same salad, but with ham and hard boiled egg instead of chicken. Friday night we go out to the bar, so I had about six diet cokes.

This is how I used to eat in February, and how I plan to continue eating, so I sure hope that I can continue to reach my goals on this diet.

In the morning, I went to the gym for the treadmill. Treadmill was tough, but instead of giving up before the 45 minutes was through, I just kept manipulating the speed until I was walking as fast as I could take it.

Duckman, you have no idea how many times that statement went through my head. I felt proud all day. :D

Thanks daveo, it's true I might end up seeing even better results with this plan. I choose everything I eat and do, and if I'm happy, I'll choose better foods and better activities.

All that rain outside my window, it goes on and on, I know
It's gettin' better every day
Soon the sun will shine outside my window, when it's gonna come
No I really, I couldn't say
No no no no no no, it's gettin' better every day - thank you

Can you hear it? Oh, it's gettin' better now, every day, yeah yeah yeah yeah

I'm a hard workin' man, doin' all that I can, tryin' to make ends meet
Just a-makin' my way through the jungle today, it's gettin' the best of me

But it's only gettin' better, and a change is gonna come my way
Yes it's only gettin' better, better every day, aha yeah

I've been changin' the scene, if you know what I mean
Good things are comin' my way
And now I'm livin' my life, and I try doin' it right
Sun shinin' every day

Well it's only gettin' better, and a change is gonna come my way
Yes it's only gettin' better, better every day
(Gettin' Better - Tesla)

I felt proud all day.

You should, and you know it's true :tu:

Reading karatetricker's thread about cheating made me realize that I've been trying to cut my calories too low, and this was putting my energy level in the trash. I trusted my body before to make the right choices, and now I give that trust back.

That chef salad I've been making must be some kind of miracle food. Had it again for lunch today, and it is SOooo good. My husband likes it too, which is a huge bonus. Made a batch of Kerry's Beanie Salad for lunch tomorrow. That stuff is my original miracle food.

This morning, I lifted weights for an hour, then did some stretching. I was going to go to the gym to use the treadmill, but it was out of order, so I went for a quick run to buy some fruits and vegetables instead. After lunch, I still hadn't had my shower, so I went to the gym. I did my lat pulldowns, and when I was done, the treadmills were busy, but no one on the weight machines, so I investigated them some. I noticed some equipment that I didn't know was available, and ended up working about an hour on the equipment. After that, I went on the treadmill. I'd planned to do just 20 minutes, but after that was done, I felt like I could go forever. However, I thought it best to quit while I was ahead, so I went home still full of energy.

I made a low fat pineapple banana strawberry cake, and a small piece with a glass of milk is just the right thing for an after dinner treat. The girls are snacking on that and apples.

If tomorrow I feel as good as I felt today, I'll be making it through the 45 minute jogging program. After a few sessions on that, I'll decide whether I want to work up to the 60 minute jog or the 45 minute run.

If, however, the two hours of weights will hit me like a ton of bricks, then tomorrow's my day off.

This is great stuff, Guava. I really appreciate the introspection. I tend to plow ahead with programs and plans and not listen to my body. It's great to read about how mindful you are. Thanks for posting this.

Good luck with the family eating. I can't budge el husbando, but I can be grateful for his support.

:nod:

Yesterday I did not have the muscle pain that I anticipated that I might. However, my treadmill workout didn't go so well anyway. I didn't make it through the set program but I jogged for a longer stretch than usual. My knees are still giving me problems and I feel like they should have improved by now. Perhaps this is something I need to talk to my doctor about.

Todays weight workout went well, but I'm starting to think that maybe my arms have gotten big enough already. I think I might just stick with the 7.5 kg dumbbells as my top weight. Anyone who says that women can't bulk too fast hasn't met me. :p

I wasn't going to post any more photos, but tomorrow is a one month anniversary from the last photo post, and I've made some good progress, so I'll take the photos then decide whether to put them up.

Thanks Chopaholic, it's good that someone can learn from what I'm sharing. My husband's diet makes me cringe sometimes, but he's cut out the chips, which is great. :claplow:

My husband's diet makes me cringe sometimes, but he's cut out the chips, which is great. :claplow:

I'm enjoying reading your thoughts as well. My transformation has been physical as well as psychological, and so I find it interesting to get a peak inside another woman's mind.

I get the feeling it really annoys you that your husband isn't being more accomodating of your new lifestyle. Give it some time. Men respond well when they feel like they've decided for themselves to change, rather than being pushed into it. If he is like my boyfriend, he will be inspired by you quietly trucking along and eventually want to join you.

I get the feeling it really annoys you that your husband isn't being more accomodating of your new lifestyle. Give it some time. Men respond well when they feel like they've decided for themselves to change, rather than being pushed into it. If he is like my boyfriend, he will be inspired by you quietly trucking along and eventually want to join you.

Accomodating? No, he's been great with that. In fact, if he knows I'm planning to cook something for lunch that the girls don't like, he'll sometimes offer to help prepare something different for himself and the girls. I was upset about a month ago that he wasn't following my example, but I'm happy now that the chips are gone, and that, even if he's not using the exercise bike, he's at least planning to use it once in a while.

He's been very supportive of my workouts. Not a question whenever I want to go to the gym or go for the walk, he's there for the girls. And he's not making fun of my food or trying to sabotage my efforts like some of the guys I know. :D

My conflict now is the aesthetics. Why is it so important to me to look good? I feel like there's something wrong with me wanting to look my best; that the "bikini body" should be reserved for single women, and I should just be happy that I have a loving family that accepts me for who I am.

So I've been trying to focus on the health aspect of fitness, but I keep coming back to vanity. It makes me feel good to look good, and to have other people say I look good, but I feel guilty about that. :o

When I looked in the mirror this morning, my abs just jumped right out at me!
:claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh:

Who knew all it would take was a little bit of cake to coax them out?

And then, maybe because I was so pumped about the abs, I completed the 45 minute treadmill program!
:jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping:

Today is a happy day.

Awesome!!!

:claphigh:

I've been on maintainance for 2 weeks, but working out a lot. Next week I'll start ripping again. I am going to get rid of the little remaining fat, dammit :tu:

Theres nothing at all wrong with wanting to look good.

You clearly want to look good for yourself, which is by far and away the single greatest reason too look good. If looking good gives you confidence and makes you happy, this will have a profound effect on the other aspects of your life. Feeling positive about your appearence will only make u feel positive about other things that you got going on.

Dont feel guilty about it, its not like your doing all this training to impress someone else (not that its not nice when people say how good you look), your doing it for you and its your life, your body, and you can strive to look as good as you want. Guilt free. Being the centre of a loving family is no reason to not look good. You will surely inspire the other members of your family to look after their health and body, rather than abuse it. And if you feel positive, it will rub off on family life to.

Ill say it again, DONT FEEL GUILTY. Its normal and fine to want to look good for yourself. :tucool:

Oh yer, and congrats on seeing your abs. Its a great day !!!! All that hard work pays off hey. :claplow: :claplow: :claplow: :claplow:

It feels nice to be "in the groove" again.

I'm pleased with how I look. My biceps are huge, my abs are strong. I still have some weak spots however. I will never love my thighs, and I just don't seem to be able to work my glutes. I've been neglecting my deadlifts, and it shows. I don't like how it feels for my back when I do the deadlift, and I'm worried about cautions not to do it because it's not safe, so I just don't do it.

My quads are great. They've gotten strong from the dumbbells squats and wall slides (stability ball), but the inner thighs, hamstrings, and glutes don't seem to be making any progress. In the last few weeks I've been specifically targeting my glutes, with still no noticable gains. I've tried it all - the butt lift, glute kickback, leg lift, ball squeezes - usually a couple of exercises three times a week, and each time three sets of fifteen. Funny thing is, I don't feel it, even while I'm doing the exercise, no matter how fast or slow I do them, or adding weight to the butt lift. I'm also doing a walk, front, side, back routine with a resistance band around my ankles, but I only ever seem to feel that in the gluteus medius.

I suppose I shall return to the deadlift. I have read some articles on proper form, and that may help me out.

I'm again feeling like I can't get a complete workout at home.

I really prefer to work out at home, so that I can do my lifting while the girls have breakfast and get ready for the day. And I don't like people to watch me work out at the gym.

But this means I'm using very limited equipment. Biceps, triceps, and shoulders are fine for home, and I think the pushups are sufficient for chest, but I think I need heavier than 7.5 kg dumbbells for my deadlift, (a barbell would be best), and my back is feeling neglected from only the supermans, bent over row, and standing upright row. A chin-up bar would help, but from what I've heard, it's very hard to do unassisted.

I get to the gym occasionally, but I still prefer doing a full body workout. I'm thinking maybe I should switch to a three day split, with one day at home and two at the gym, even though that's not what I really want to do.

Okay, I think I'm finally getting the hang of setting up workout schedules. I think I can say now that I am on my "summer maintenance plan"

Yesterday's research paid off. I did my weight workout at the gym this morning. I didn't record the weights, so I'll try to remember best I can. Here's what I did:
Barbell Deadlift 20 kg 3 sets of 8
Dumbbell Rear Lunge 7.5 kg 3 sets of 15
Leg Presses 66kg 3 sets of 15 with different foot position
Dumbell Step ups 7.5 kg 3 sets of 15
Seated cable rows 30 kg * 3 sets of 12 see note
lat pulldown (wide grip) 20 kg 3 sets of 10
lat pulldown (close grip) 30 kg 3 sets of 10
straight arm pulldown 10kg* 3 sets of 12

I hate rest time, so I didn't actually do the sets together, but hopped from one exercise to another.

For the seated cable rows, the cable seemed too short as compared to the drawing I have, and I didn't see a way to shorten it. As I was trying to target the middle back, I was leaning forward on the release, and leaning back on the pull, not moving my arms much at all, but rather my back. Not sure if this is right. To target the lats, I would have required much less weight for my arms to be able to handle it.

I was surprised that the straight arm pulldown was such a low weight. Not sure if this means I have very weak lats or not.

I didn't enjoy the deadlifts much, but I'll keep trying. The dumbbell stepups will definitely be an addition to my routine. I liked this routine so much I'll probably do it twice a week, and do the rest of the body once a week.

After this workout, I was sweating quite a lot, but not really tired. I did 20 minutes on the treadmill, the first half of my jogging program, except I increased the slope by 2% (so it was between 3 and 5%) to work my calves harder. I don't feel I need to do any actually exercises specifically for the calves because they've always been strong.

Physical Changes: I'm always just a little surprised that I can still see my abs. I thought maybe that I was just imagining it, or that it was just a temporary thing and I'd be back to normal me for everyday. There's also a weird little dip in the front near the hip bone. This is the obliques, I suppose. And in addition to the pecs, I'm seeing a lot of definition in the gluteus medius, of all places.

On the other hand, I must have a bit of a distorted body image. I never see myself as fat when I look in the mirror, but sometimes I feel like I've always looked this way and haven't made any progress.

I stand taller. With my back and ab muscles how they are, it's nearly impossible to slouch. I'm stronger. I used to grunt when I lifted heavy objects, now they're not so heavy any more. I can carry my daughter down the street in one hand, and her bicycle in the other. My endurance is greater. No huffing and puffing when going up stairs. I haven't been tracking my heart rate, but I think I can work much longer before an increase in heart rate.

After a good back workout, I can actually breathe better. The muscles are doing their job in supporting everything in the right place.

Emotional Changes: During workouts, I feel great. It's good to know I'm doing something to improve my quality and duration of life. Immediately after the workouts, I feel like I could rule the world, and the feeling carries forward, sometimes for hours.

Present Problem: I've had some flatulence issues, which is aparently quite common for other people on the boards as well. Usually it is accompanied by bloating, which is a real problem for me, because it is blocking my hunger signals. Because I am using hunger as my guideline for what to feed myself, when I can't read those signals, I can't figure out how much to eat. I'm guessing for now that excessive Diet Coke could be the problem, so I will make a strong effort to cut back on it, even though it's a difficult thing for me to sacrifice. I have bought some carbonated water, and I don't know if this will agree with me more, or if the carbonation is what is causing the gas problems and so water is no better. Just in case, I made a bottle of Crystal Light to sip on throughout the day.

why not try ice cold water with a lemon squeezed in?
I used to drink coke (not even diet) almost exclusively, then I just started drinking water. If you use your imiganation, it tastes like anything :)

I love what you are doing here Guava. i really like your approach. :tu:

In real life, I'm just a mom, ya know?
Actually, I don't know. If you ask me, there's nothing, absolutely NOTHING, "just" about being a mom. To me, most moms (there are exceptions) are superheroes. I can just imagine how much work you must put into taking care of the kids, and I'm impressed by that you manage to do that, AND keep a healthy lifestyle. It's simply amazing... :tu:

The leg and back workout was good while doing it. No pain yesterday, but my muscles are paying for it today. I can feel it in the glutes, which is nice, but the middle back is what's really killing me. I might have to go a little easier next time I do it.

My aerobics instructor was on holidays for six weeks. She started up again today. I found that actually, I prefer the treadmill workout-wise, but I like to see all the people in the class, so I'll alternate depending on mood. Tomorrow's class is a step circuit, so I will see how I like that. Wednesday is a muscle conditioning class, and I'm too embarrassed to bring in my weights that are 4 times heavier than what the rest of the class uses, so I'll skip that class. New also is a 30 minute yoga session after Monday and Wednesday's class. It was okay, but I'm not thrilled about it.

Since about the middle of January, I've been working out for an hour and a half every day. From all I've read, I should be taking a day off each week and a week off every two months, but I'm not yet bored or tired of this routine, so I'll keep it up until my mood suffers. I tried to make myself take a week off, but unless I have something else rewarding to do for those 90 minutes, I can't do it. My workouts make me feel good. :db:

Barbell Deadlift 20 kg 3 sets of 8
Dumbbell Rear Lunge 7.5 kg 3 sets of 15
Leg Presses 66kg 3 sets of 15 with different foot position
Dumbell Step ups 7.5 kg 3 sets of 15
Seated cable rows 30 kg * 3 sets of 12 see note
lat pulldown (wide grip) 20 kg 3 sets of 10
lat pulldown (close grip) 30 kg 3 sets of 10
straight arm pulldown 10kg* 3 sets of 12

:( I'm still sore (Tuesday morning) from Sunday's workout, so I will take it easy tomorrow. Probably I'll do 3 sets of 8 dumbbell curls, some tricep dips, and 3x8 pushups, then see how I feel for the treadmill 20-45 minutes. I'd really like to get through the 45 minute jogging program again just to prove that it wasn't a fluke. Saturday, I couldn't get to the gym, so I substituted my treadmill for an 75 minute outdoor walk/jog which included lots of stairs (which explains the still tightness in my glutes). Today I did a step circuit class with my aerobics instructor, and it included a lot of glute work too.

I'm surprised that the closer I get to an "ideal" body, the more important it becomes that I look even better. Six months ago, I thought I looked fine, and had no incentive to improve my muscle tone, now, suddenly, I can see where there's work to be done, and I know that I can make a difference. This is not a bad thing. It gives me goals to work for. I'm a little bit worried about what I'm going to do if/when I get to where I feel is my best, because then I won't have the motivation to keep at it. What I'm doing right now I now I don't feel I can keep up for the rest of my life, but it's what I want to be doing while I can (maybe until September).

why not try ice cold water with a lemon squeezed in?
I used to drink coke (not even diet) almost exclusively, then I just started drinking water. If you use your imiganation, it tastes like anything :)

My Diet Coke restriction is getting me down. I have to try it for a week to see if it improves the bloating, but I'll probably stick it back in next week just to confirm that the bloating will come back.

Due to my reduction in caffeine through Coke, I had an extra piece of cake yesterday, and had a "diet coffee" (decaf with sweetener) while watching a movie. The diet coffee was a good idea. Chocolate milk will help too, I'm sure, and it's a lot less caffeine than cola.

Water with lemon is not as good as Crystal light, but it'll do if I'm desparate. Must find some caffeine free diet Coke.

I'm still having trouble with the Diet Coke restriction.

I've been EXTREMELY crabby in the evenings after 8:00, and for the last two nights, I've gone to sleep with my daughter at 9:00 instead of the usual 11:30 or so.

To top it off, I still had bloating this morning. Since Sunday, I haven't been seeing my abs like I did last week. I measured my waist before lunch at 27 1/2 inches and it was 26 last week. They looked better later on, so I measured again, and its 26.

I don't seem cut out for these split days. Wednesday lunch time I was still feeling slight tension in my back from Sunday, so, as good as the workout felt at the time, I'll have to mix it up into easier sessions. I worked the biceps today, and they felt weak. I think I'm better off working the whole body three times a week as I was before.

I measured my waist before lunch at 27 1/2 inches and it was 26 last week. They looked better later on, so I measured again, and its 26.

When you measure your abs, do you flex? I never know which way is correct for recording my stats.

When you measure your abs, do you flex? I never know which way is correct for recording my stats.

26 inches at the end of an exhale. I don't flex. But, with strong ab muscles, it doesn't make much difference. When my waist was 28 inches, I could balloon it out to 30 inches, and suck it in to 26 inches. At 26 inch waist, I can balloon it out to 27 and suck it in to 25.

I cannot function without caffeine. Yesterday evening, I was just NASTY. I took my daughters shopping with me, and normally, when I can deal with their whining, it was driving me into an absolute frenzy. :mad:

I had a diet Coke when I got back, and immediately felt better, but immediate got gas as well. :o

So much for my cutting back. New rule, no Coke before 3pm, the rest I'll have to allow. I'd rather be bloated and gaseous than tired and irritable. :rolleyes:

26 inches at the end of an exhale. I don't flex. But, with strong ab muscles, it doesn't make much difference. When my waist was 28 inches, I could balloon it out to 30 inches, and suck it in to 26 inches. At 26 inch waist, I can balloon it out to 27 and suck it in to 25.

You must be very tiny--I hope you realize this. Correct me if I'm wrong, but in your first journal entries you sound a bit disappointed with your progress. I think you should be very proud. The last time my waist was 26" on an exhale was probably freshman year of high school, and I'm pretty trim. Not that you should be comparing yourself to me, nor I to you, but I just wanted to give you some perspective. Do other people tell you look great? I bet they do. I remember seeing your pictures posted a while ago on the media gallery and thinking, "Wow, she's already there!"

Thanks Trinity. Your comments do mean a lot.

It's funny because I haven't been this tiny since I was twelve years old, so it does feel a little weird to not be average or above average for a change. The few times that someone does tell me how great I look makes up for all the time I spend looking after my body. But most of what makes up for it is the easier breathing, the simple lifting, and the tight toned feeling.

Your photos in the media gallery were so great. I even pointed them out as an example to someone of what great progress a person can make.

It's very hard not to compare to other people. My friend is on weight watchers and she says one of the things she says is

"God, if you can't make me thin, then make my friends fat."

Maybe this is just a woman thing, to want to look better than other people, not just to try and look your personal best.

Because I do look my personal best. I have never looked better but I still feel there's more I could do.

I don't want to get any smaller, but I still don't like the way my thighs look. Unfortunately, I may never like the way they look no matter what I do, and I may just have to just do a little more self acceptance and a little less calorie deprivation and physical exertion.

Thanks, you made me smile. :nod:

Okay, here's what I found:

The more I focus on working out to look good, the less successful I am, both in meeting my strength and endurance goals, and in changing my body composition.

The more I focus on improving my heart health and my emotional well-being, but more successful I am at reaching my strength and endurance goals, and making a change in my body.

Today was success #2 at the 45 minute jogging program on the treadmill.
:jumping: :jumping: :jumping:

Not necessarily because I haven't had the motivation to do it again before now, but because I haven't had the opportunity. Every day I've either weight trained or gone to aerobics class. The treadmill seems to suit me better for now. I skipped class today and did my 45 minute program. Yay! Afterward, I bumped the incline up to 10% and walked my baseline walking speed 6km/h for five minutes, then 6km/h for five minutes on 2% slope, then a cool-down for a total of one hour on the treadmill. This is the first time that I have said "Okay, that was good, I'm ready to quit now." Before I've always wanted to go at it again after the cool-down. I think the big slope increase at the end is key to the "finished" feeling.

I thank Trinity for putting me into the mindset this time to complete the program, and I have Duckman and daveo to thank for motivating me into the first success.

Keeping this journal is cool. There sure are some weird thoughts that go through my head.

Success #3 on the treadmill this morning. (other than a tiny little cheat, where I dipped to 6km/h instead of 8 km/h for just one minute), It was very hard however, and I think I need some fresh motivation. I will upload some new songs onto my mp3 player, and that should help.

The pool opens tomorrow. I spent my first two months of working out focused mainly on arms, but now I'm wondering why I was focusing on abs for the third month. I'm not planning to wear a bikini, so I think it would have been smarter to tone my thighs and butt. My new leg workouts are moving me along fairly quickly, so I should be comfortable with them in about a month if everything keeps at the same pace. I had so much fear of adding inches to those areas that I didn't want to work them other than a couple of simple moves, but now they look flabby and unbalanced compared to the rest of me.

There, see, I'm contradicting myself.

More work, or more self acceptance? I guess a little of each is in order.

When I'm in a good mood, I feel like I can achieve anything, when I'm in a bad mood, the best idea seems to be to accept myself how I am.

I don't want to work any harder at transforming my body, but sometimes just some small changes can make big differences and really motivate me to make more changes.

Here are my new goals:

1) increase cardiovascular endurance (make it through the 45 minute jogging program on the treadmill)
2) continue to increase muscular strength
3) eat to nourish my body instead of eat to look good
4) encourage my family to become active with me
5) continue to shift my family's diet to a more healthy one


I like these goals best, but it's hard to stay focused on them.

Focus. :db:

Life is all about feeling up sometimes and down sometimes.

Somtimes i look in the mirror and feel motivated and ready to take on the world ! Im impressed with the image infront of me, and im happy with what ive achieved. I feel strong, fit and confident. Im happy with my progress.

Other days i look in the mirror, and i feel drained and dis-satisfied, perhaps almost defeated. All this hard work and im STILL seeing imperfections ?!?!?! Maybe im not working hard enough, maybe im not eating strict enough? Or perhaps im doing the wrong excersizes, focussing on the wrong things? Have i neglected that part of my body, should i have done an extra set, an extra 10 mins on the treadmill? Did i really push myself?

Your not alone with all these "weird thoughts" in my head. EVERYONE HAS THEM. But what you have to remember is that literal perfection doesnt exist. You say you see people and think " I want to look better then them", but ill bet they are looking at someone else and thinking "I want to look better then them". When u reach one level of acheivement, you want to embark on another. Thats what motivated people like yourself do. Once youve improved one thing, you head out and tackle something else.

You say that you feel arrogant to want to aim to look good. But what you dont see is that arrogance is thinking your already perfect, which is impossible, as literal perfection doesnt exist ! An arrogant person will look in the mirror and think they see perfection. All YOU want is to look good. Thats not arrogance, because you see flaws and strive to improve them, like all of us on this forum, hell, most people in the world see flaws in themselves. Its normal.

The difference maker is whether you have the inner drive to correct them, or at least to give it your all trying. When you see those imperfections, I say be happy ! Why? Because you have the drive and motivation to act ! That makes you special. Most people look in the mirror, and see an unheathly looking image staring back at them (Just look at obesity levels!). But you look good! In your eyes, you could look better, and its ok to think like that, but dont confuse being able to look better with not looking good !!! And when you look in the mirror, remember the inner qualitys all this hard work is achieveing. A healthy heart for one. Ok, so the 60 mins on the treadmill hasnt improved your thighs today. Its sure as hell made your heart healthier. The fact that you are able to critique yourself and look for improvment, the fact that you want to look good, be heathly etc isnt arrogance. Its proof that your commited and driven. Everytime you notice something, your proving that youre motivated and driven. Look at your imperfections and smile and think "Im going to giev my all to changing that." :)

You will always be driven towards your goals, and in my opinion, you'll never reach them, simply supass them, because by the time you get there, you motivation will drive you on past. Its normal to have days where u feel that your legs need more work, or that you have neglected a body part etc. Thats humanity. Thats life. Ups and downs. :)

You say you see people and think " I want to look better then them", but ill bet they are looking at someone else and thinking "I want to look better then them". When u reach one level of acheivement, you want to embark on another. Thats what motivated people like yourself do. Once youve improved one thing, you head out and tackle something else.

You say that you feel arrogant to want to aim to look good. But what you dont see is that arrogance is thinking your already perfect, which is impossible, as literal perfection doesnt exist ! An arrogant person will look in the mirror and think they see perfection. All YOU want is to look good. Thats not arrogance, because you see flaws and strive to improve them, like all of us on this forum, hell, most people in the world see flaws in themselves. Its normal.



I don't see people and say I want to look better than them. I see people and think I want to look as good as them.

I don't feel arrogant to want to look good, I feel superficial. A friend of mine told me that she doesn't dress up anymore because she "has her man". I wouldn't go that far, to stop doing my hair and stop buying nice clothes, but who really needs me to have a toned tummy and tighter glutes?

I want to look better because it changes the way that people interact with me. Or so it would seem. Maybe it just changes the way that I interact with them. :confused:

I don't feel arrogant to want to look good, I feel superficial. A friend of mine told me that she doesn't dress up anymore because she "has her man". I wouldn't go that far, to stop doing my hair and stop buying nice clothes, but who really needs me to have a toned tummy and tighter glutes?

YOU need the toned tummy and tighter glutes. This fitness thing should be all about you, the way you want to feel, the way you want to look. That's why if I see a girl with more muscles than I like I don't say anything because that's how SHE wants to look. I let her be, instead of criticising her. More power to her. When she is happy with what she sees in the mirror then she'll have that extra spring in her step making her interactions with others better.

Your friend should dress up, for herself and her "man". I bet her husband will shower her with compliments if she dresses up every now and then. She'll love that!

:D

YOU need the toned tummy and tighter glutes. This fitness thing should be all about you, the way you want to feel, the way you want to look. That's why if I see a girl with more muscles than I like I don't say anything because that's how SHE wants to look. I let her be, instead of criticising her. More power to her. When she is happy with what she sees in the mirror then she'll have that extra spring in her step making her interactions with others better.

Your friend should dress up, for herself and her "man". I bet her husband will shower her with compliments if she dresses up every now and then. She'll love that!

:D

Yes, I do, you're right. I just wouldn't feel as good if I didn't. I DO interact much better with people when I know I look great.

I was happy to see that my friend wore make-up on her birthday. It was her husband's birthday on Friday. I hope she wore make-up then too.

It's a lazy week.

It's time for a week off, but I don't seem to be able to do it. I've set aside this time each day to work out, and if I don't fill it, I feel like I'm letting myself down, and that a part of myself is missing. Maybe I need to make an appointment to get my legs waxed or something. :confused:

I fell asleep last night even before I put the girls to bed. They had to wake up their daddy from the couch. I guess we overdid it on Saturday. We went to a barbecue and got too much sun. Sunday I was tired and had a headache. Today it's only slightly better.

So this morning I slept in. It would have been a good rest day, but I couldn't stop myself from going to the gym. I did 30 minutes on the treadmill, then came home for some plie squats and some shrugs. So it was a shorter workout than usual.

Saturday there was a woman in the gym watching me do rows. (A "friend" of mine.) She told me that I shouldn't do them because they were bad for my back, and that I would end up with no breasts. I don't know how she failed to notice that I already had no breasts. :rolleyes: So I just smiled and nodded, and continued on with my routine. Anyway, she showed me how she does her leg lifts. Those things are killers! I'll add those in once in a while as well.

I still can't seem to take a week off, but at least now I have a plan.

Cardio days I will do my 45 minute jogging program, with 5 minute warm-up, five minute high incline walk, and 5 minute cool-down, and maybe I will do my abs. Don't forget the stretching! This should be at least three to four days a week.

Muscle days, I will get back to my full-body work-out schedule, choosing one exercise from each body part. This is about an hour, I think. Don't forget the stretching! I'll aim again for three days a week. If I REALLY feel the need to do cardio on lifting days, (which I usually do) it will be in the form of a moderate pace walk to buy fruits and vegetables (about a half a mile each way). I might do this only twice a week, because I'm enjoying the cardio more than the weights right now.

I don't think I'll be able to take an off day, but for variety, I'll try to stay off the treadmill, and do a jog around instead, incorporating lots of slopes and stairs.

Yesterday, I ate a LOT of sugar (mostly from fruit). I think this is maybe indicative of too much working out. I have to stop doing the weights and cardio on the same day, although it was working great for a long time.

Focus on health, not on vanity. :gl:

Yesterday after lunch, I went shopping. The shops are about a mile away, so it's good exercise. I bought a new pair of jeans. I probably don't need a new pair of jeans, but they do look great on me, so how could I resist?

Treadmills were busy today, so instead of waiting, I did my outdoor circuit. Three rounds of alternate fast walk and run, then three rounds of walking, then jogging the steps. I forgot to take my watch, and I was disappointed to notice that I was only gone 40 minutes. I will have to calculate how far the route is, and next time maybe I'll do four rounds of each.

Four people today told me how great I look today, and two of them asked me for fitness advice. Must remember to wear outfit more often(brown ribbed mock neck t-shirt, and brown wool blend pants).

I'm starting to get curious about how much I really eat in a day, so I might start keeping track, just to get a ballpark figure. If you do make comments on my diet, don't be too hard on it, because I'm happy with it, and happy with the results I'm getting most of the time. :p

Today I had:
7:40 orange bran muffin, apple, 400 ml 1% milk
9:00 500 ml water
10:00 orange bran muffin
12:00 125 g salmon, 1 small carrot, half a small red pepper, half an orange, 500 ml Crystal Light iced tea
1:00 250 ml multifruit and carrot juice (at a friend's house, I don't normally drink juice)
2:00 2 dog biscuits (see the peanut butter recipes thread)
4:00 one apple, 1 dog biscuit, 250 ml diet Coke
6:00 1/2 C diced cucumber, 1 small diced tomato, lettuce, half a small red pepper, one green onion, 1/2 C diced ham, 1 hard boiled egg, 2 T salad dressing, 250 ml diet Coke, 250 ml water.

For breakfast, I always have an apple and a glass of milk. With it usually goes about 1/2 C fat free homemade granola, or sometimes something I baked.

I rarely drink water during the day (quite often I only drink it during exercise), but I try to once in a while. I know, I drink way too much diet Coke.

Lunch and dinner are different every day, but the salmon meal today is a favorite. I almost always have homemade baked goods around to snack on like fat free banana bread or sugarless bars. In the evening, I'll sometimes have some tapioca pudding or fat free sugar free Jello instant pudding.

I don't measure any of this stuff, so I could be way off. And I didn't actually eat the supper yet. That's just what I'm planning to have.

Well I love a rainy night
I love a rainy night
I love to hear the thunder
Watch the lightning
When it lights up the sky
You know it makes me feel good

Well I love a rainy night
It's such a beautiful sight
I love to feel the rain
On my face
To taste the rain on my lips
In the moonlight shadow

CHORUS:
Showers washed
All my cares away
I'd wake up to a sunny day
'Cause I love a rainy night
Yes I love a rainy night
Well I love a rainy night
I love a rainy night

Wow, fitday is pretty cool. :cool:

From the best I could estimate, here's my total for today:
Calories Eaten Today
source grams cals %total
Total: 1623
Fat: 64 574 36%
Sat: 12 108 7%
Poly: 15 135 8%
Mono: 14 130 8%
Carbs: 203 683 43%
Fiber: 32 0 0%
Protein: 83 332 21%
Alcohol: 0 0 0%

I suppose I could use some more protein in my diet. Tomorrow I'll be having tuna for lunch. Maybe with whole wheat pasta.

Hmm... maybe I'll put a tablespoon of yogurt on my salad instead of that Russian dressing.
Total: 1481
Fat: 49 439 30%
Sat: 10 91 6%
Poly: 6 54 4%
Mono: 11 98 7%
Carbs: 200 673 47%
Fiber: 32 0 0%
Protein: 83 332 23%
Alcohol: 0 0 0%

The salad was great with no dressing at all.

I got hungry later on in the evening, so I had two more dog treats, spread with strawberry jam, because they're a little bland.

I tracked my calories again today, and they were around 1600 as well. So I had a piece of cheesecake when I got hungry in the evening. I've never counted my calories before, and haven't researched how many I should be consuming, but I guess that's below my maintenance level.

So for a few weeks before I started this journal, I must have been eating less than 1500 calories. No wonder I was depressed!

I'm getting frustrated again with the inability to spot reduce. I don't need to lose any more off my waist. It keeps shrinking while my thighs stay the same. Pretty soon my waist will be 25 and my thighs still 21 1/2. That doesn't sound right. I'm trying my darndest to target my upper legs, but it's hard to see much difference there. They're a little tighter, but they're not shrinking. Self-acceptance here we come.

I have felt considerably better about my workouts (and been less hungry) since cutting back on the exercise as of May 5.

#4 completion of 45 minute jogging program. I thought it would be easier to complete by now. :( I had just enough energy left at the end to run at 12 km/h for 1 minute before my cooldown. :rolleyes:

The new music was a help. I Love a Rainy Night by Eddie Rabbit has to be the best song for moderate walking. Closely followed by, ironically enough, Here Comes the Sun by George Harrison. For a slow jog, I'll take Finish What Ya Started by Van Halen, or Hurts so Good by John Mellecamp, or All She Wants to do is Dance by Don Henley. I have not found the perfect song for running. Perhaps it would be by Metallica or The Black Crowes. If anyone has any ideas, let me know.

I played around with fitday for the last few days, and it's surprising to see how well I've naturally regulated my calories to fit my fitness goals.

I didn't realize that fitday also analyzed nutrients. It's valuable to learn what I'm missing out on (Vitamin K, for one), and which values I'm meeting without a problem. My calcium intake still falls a little below the RDA, so I will have to remember to keep taking my supplements for that.

I was contemplating my teeth the other day. They're not white. I may at some point try a tooth whitener, but for now, I'd like to set the goal of brushing my teeth after each time I drink a cola or coffee. Maybe it will cause me to second think the drink. Of course I realize as well that the cola has a detrimental effect on my nutrients:
For every 150 milligrams of caffeine (found in approximately one 8-ounce cup of coffee or two to three 12-ounce cans of caffeinated soda), approximately five milligrams of calcium is excreted out in the urine. This loss can add up and could be detrimental for your bones, particularly if your diet is already insufficient in calcium.

Today was a shopping day, as most Saturdays are. I got two new pair of pants for my eight year old, and some new bras for myself. It's hard to find anywhere that sells them in my size, so when I do find them, I stock up.


I’m gonna make a change,
For once in my life
It’s gonna feel real good,
Gonna make a difference
Gonna make it right . . .

As i, turn up the collar on my
Favourite winter coat
This wind is blowin’ my mind
I see the kids in the street,
With not enough to eat
Who am i, to be blind?
Pretending not to see their needs
A summer’s disregard,
A broken bottle top
And a one man’s soul
They follow each other on the wind ya’ know
’cause they got nowhere to go
That’s why I want you to know

I’m starting with the man in the mirror
I’m asking him to change his ways
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself, and then make a change

I’ve been a victim of a selfish kind of love
It’s time that I realize
That there are some with no home, not a nickel to loan
Could it be really me,
Pretending that they’re not alone?

A willow deeply scarred,
Somebody’s broken heart
And a washed-out dream
They follow the pattern of the wind, ya’ see
Cause they got no place to be
That’s why I’m starting with me

(Man In The Mirror - Michael-Jackson)

I found my answer. Funny what happens when you do something as simple as type music exercise (http://www.spun.com/music/browse-alpha.jsp?genid=11250) into Google.

Now, where's my credit card?

Today, we went out for lunch to celebrate mother's day. It was fun.

Whenever I'm doing well in my "whole life improvement program", I find new ways to complicate it, I mean improve it.

I'm still tracking my diet on fitday, and I'm starting to wonder about the 40/40/20 split that everyone seems to be doing.

About 30% of my calories right now are coming from fat, but I'm satisfied with that. About 50% of calories come from carbs, which leaves about 20% from protein. I'm pretty happy with my diet, taste-wise, calorie-wise, fullfeeling-wise, so maybe I shouldn't mess with it, but I can't help feeling that maybe I should do all that I can to improve it. For supper tonight I wanted a huge fruit salad with yogurt dressing and walnuts and some toast with peanut butter. Instead, I had a small fruit salad, whole wheat pasta, ham, and spinach with a fat free cream cheese sauce. It was just as good as the fruit salad, and probably was a better fit into my diet.

So much more to learn....

Success #5 on treadmill.

I was able to increase my protein intake for today by having almost a whole can of tuna with my lunch. I mixed it with spinach, cottage cheese, red pepper, and lemon peel. Supper will be homemade lasagna, with cottage cheese, meat sauce, and extra TVP so I put the info into fit day and it tells me:

Total: 1732
Fat: 55 494 30%
Sat: 21 189 11%
Poly: 6 58 3%
Mono: 22 201 12%
Carbs: 207 726 44%
Fiber: 26 0 0%
Protein: 108 434 26%
Alcohol: 0 0 0%

This was through stuffing myself with more protein than I've eaten in a long time. There is no way I could possibly get above 30% protein unless I buy some protein powder or start eating tuna for breakfast. My muscle development is suiting me fine, so I'm not sure I have enough evidence to change my diet yet. Fat is still at 30% which I don't expect to change.

I found some chickpeas in my cupboard, so I searched allrecipes for some ideas on what to do with them. I think I'll have to go with the:
Chickpea Falafel Burgers (http://vegetarian.allrecipes.com/az/49374.asp). Problem is, no way my family will eat anything with chickpeas in them, so I'll have to do something entirely different for them. Hope they enjoy the leftover lasagna. :rolleyes:

About 30% of my calories right now are coming from fat, but I'm satisfied with that. About 50% of calories come from carbs, which leaves about 20% from protein. I'm pretty happy with my diet, taste-wise, calorie-wise, fullfeeling-wise, so maybe I shouldn't mess with it, but I can't help feeling that maybe I should do all that I can to improve it.

If it aint broke, dont fix it. :nod:

I'm leaning in that direction Reno.

I tried to improve my exercise routine a couple of weeks ago and it messed me up for a whole week. Now I'm back to doing almost the same thing I was before. I expect the diet would probably go the same way....

At least now I'll look at it from a different perspective. If I get hungry outside of regular meals, I'll try to reach for protein in favor of carbs.

Tuna for breakfast.

Yeah, well, still had some leftover from lunch. I have to either eat it or throw it out. I spread it on a slice of whole wheat bread, then broiled it in the oven. Then I had a glass of water and a banana with it.

I have protein powder! My husband heard me mention it, so he asked our friend if I could try some. What a sweetie. :nod: So he gave us about a cup. Anyone can tell me how much a "scoop" is? I think he said four teaspoons. I'll have to see him for the nutrient contents. Anyway, just to try it, I mixed a teaspoon with a cup of milk as my post workout shake. Taste was not exactly delicious, but fine (strawberry). I'm sure it's just my imagination, but it really perked me up.

The chickpea "burgers" were fine, but not at all like a real burger. They need to be eaten more like falafel, with pita bread, and LOTS of tomato. Nobody in the family, of course, would eat them but me, so I ate two and have two left over. They really weren't that filling, so it's a good thing they don't have many calories in them. Husband ate leftover lasagna, and he made noodles for the girls as well, because they weren't crazy about the lasagna. I cut up a bunch of melon that went over quite well. He threatened that we're ALL eating tuna tomorrow for lunch.

I made some of the protein powder into peanut butter balls
Melt 1/4 C peanut butter with 2 T honey, stir in 6 T protein powder and 1/4 C oats. They look and smell pretty good, but I don't need the calories right now, so I'll try them out when I need a snack. Chocolate, banana, or vanilla might have been better, but I think the strawberry will be interesting.

Fitday gives me this for the day so far
Total: 901
Fat: 22 198 23%
Sat: 8 75 9%
Poly: 4 36 4%
Mono: 7 66 8%
Carbs: 128 461 54%
Fiber: 13 0 0%
Protein: 50 200 23%
Alcohol: 0 0 0%

But I'm not sure the whey is recorded properly with fitday.
Protein supplement, milk-based, powdered, not reconstituted
0.25 packet 52 0 10 3
How big is a packet?
Does 206 calories, 38 g carbohydrates and 13 g protein per 4 teaspoons sound right?

I have a huge cramp in my thumb, but I don't think it's a weight lifting injury. I attribute it to grating the cheese for lasagna. See? Lasagna is hazardous to your health.

Breakfast this morning was barley and berry soup. :eat:

I got some pita bread for lunch, and ate one of those leftover chickpea burgers with a whole tomato. I also mixed up my version of tahini with about 2 tsp each of peanut butter, yogurt and lemon juice. It was SOooo good.

Yesterday, I looked at some recipes on the internet, and I might start to bake some bread. I can't find any quality whole grain bread here, so it's best to do it from scratch. Now I just need to find the quality whole grains. :confused: My health food store might have some, but I didn't have much luck last time I looked.

Treadmill this morning was tough. Cheating today was for four minutes (bumped down to 6km/h instead of 8 km/h), so I won't count it as a success. Maybe I need more sleep. I don't know.

I'm 200 calories lower today than I was yesterday, so I can gear up for a good afternoon snack. I think 50% carbs, 25% fat, and 25% protein will work well for me as a daily total. I didn't intend to keep tracking with fitday, but I'm a little addicted now. It is so helpful to see where I was low in calories but still not hungry (hint: lots of tuna with tomato and/or red pepper)

Yummy, berry barley soup for breakfast again.

My life revolves around food. I wouldn't have it any other way. :eat:

My neighbor gave me a huge container full of puffed wheat cake. Don't want to eat it, don't want to give it to the kids, don't want to throw it out. We're slowly working on small pieces as snacks/treats. It's mostly air anyhow.

It's funny. I don't like when other people give me food, because it deprives me of the enjoyment of making it. If I'm eating her puffed wheat cake, I can't make my own brownies or cookies. I get almost as much satisfaction from baking a cake as eating a cake. Just like my chocolate disorder where I have to buy it, but I can't eat it. It REALLY bugs me when my husband buys cakes or cookies. "What on earth did you do that for? I would have baked you a cake if you asked me!" I think I need to start up a restaurant.

I saw the doctor today. He put me on birth control pills to control acne. Acne at 30. I hate it. I hope they don't cause weight gain.

I asked him about whether I was able to find flax seed in town, and he said the local health food store had some, but to save me a trip, he gave me a bag he had in his office. I told him I was going to make bread, and he recommended that I grind half the amount before adding it, because otherwise it'll go right through me without getting the omega 3s.

I weighed myself at the clinic, because I don't have the scale. 120. Same as I weighed a month ago. Funny, I thought I'd be lower.

For supper, I made spinach ricotta pancakes. They were good, but a little bland, so I made a lemon yogurt sauce to pour on top, which was a vast improvement. Then I got a surprise when I entered them into fitday. Next time, I think I will use cottage cheese instead. It appear to be much lower in calories and fat (and cheaper to boot). I believe however, that the ricotta is higher in calcium and maybe protein. I am disappointed that the low fat varieties are unavailable.

I went to an Italian cooking demonstration in the afternoon. He showed us how to make four different pasta sauces. They had WAY more than a tablespoon of olive oil per serving. No wonder food tastes so much better at restaurants than when I make it. I just couldn't bring myself to throw that much fat in there.

For the last few days, due to an abundant supply of great-flavored Crystal Light, I've done fine without any diet Coke. So my negative symptoms were not caffeine withdrawl, they were behavioral reactions to me telling myself that I was not allowed to consume it. Change my mindset and I will change my behavior.

Whatever ya got, I'll take it.

Need help moving some furniture? I'm your gal.

Want someone to organize your dinner party? Call me.

Can I do your presentation for you? Clean your oven? Look after your three screaming kids?

Me, me, me. I can do it all! I can conquer the world!

45 minutes jogging for the 6th time today. Hell, I coulda done it twice I was so pumped.

:jumping: :jumping: :jumping:

My husband said all our friends have noticed I've been losing weight. They are, aparently, worried about me. :rolleyes: I started a rant about it in the fat loss forum. It's not like I'm wasting away to nothing. My biceps are growing, not shrinking. My cardiovascular endurance has dramatically increased. My energy is sky high, and my mood is generally elevated.

I don't need a personal trainer. I just need someone telling me I look great. :tucool:

Last night while browsing some sites, I came across some info that leads me to believe I don't need as much protein as I orinally thought. 0.6 g per kg of body weight should do me fine. 32 g. And I was shooting for 100 g.

Meat is not filling me up as much as fruits. Beans are not satisfying me as much as pineapple. I love sugar. So, I'm adapting my meal plan again. We'll see what happens when I eat more of the food I love. For maximum nutrient value, I should be increasing my vegetables, but I don't love vegetables, so there's my second priority.

I'm in the middle of making Dee's Health Bread (http://bread.allrecipes.com/az/DeeHealthBread.asp) That's for supper. With either peanut butter and raisins or some leftover pork tenderloin. Still have fruit salad left from lunch, and I might make a vegetable salad. Coleslaw (made with yogurt dressing) would be nice, but then I'd have to go out shopping. Maybe I'll do the orange poppyseed salad dressing with the lettuce, cucumber, and tomato that's in the fridge.

I'm trying to wean myself off fitday. It's been helpful, but I'm letting it control my diet, and I'd rather take control myself again. I was pleased to see I'm getting my recommended amount of fiber. Barley is a regular part of my diet. If no barley for breakfast, then I get bran muffins, or oatmeal. I finally love breakfast!

Tonight, I'm off the the bar to shoot some pool. Watch out. I'm in the mood to win. :D

#7 and #8 through the 45 minute jogging program today and yesterday. It's still not getting much easier most days, so I think I'll keep it up even once I get to 10 successes, instead of switching to a one hour program or to a running program. I can always add on at the end, as I've been doing on enthusiastic days.

I was practically unbeatable at pool Friday night. We won five games in a row my first run, then in the second run, my partner (my huband that time) threw the game on the third game (an obvious miss at the 8 ball) because he didn't want to play anymore.

The bread was great, so I'm making more today.

I received my self-tanner from Avon on Friday, so I tried it out on my stomach Saturday morning. It worked great, so yesterday I did the whole body, including my face with a similar product. I thought it looked great, but today I noticed streaks on my arms, which is probably because I didn't exfoliate.

My mom e-mailed me that she's on the Atkins diet with her husband. I don't believe in Atkins, but they sound pretty happy about it, so I'm encouraging her.

#10 success completed today.

:claplow: :claplow: :claplow:

And after four consecutive days on the treadmill as well. I'm still not ready to change my routine, so I'll keep doing what I'm doing until I feel ready to progress to something more challenging.

My reward: a new bikini. The top is fabulous, but the bottoms don't really cover my butt and they expose my stretch marks.. :( I'll have to look for a separate bottom that coordinates or learn to be more comfortable exposing a little more.

It occurred to me that my greatest successes on the treadmill occur on the weekend. I attribute this to exercising in a fasted state. Does that make sense? I can push myself harder on an empty stomach. Who woulda guessed? Anyway, my schedule dictates that I eat right after I wake up on weekdays, so that I have time to get my girls ready for the day. It's about an hour after eating before I do my cardio, but still, I end up getting mild abdominal cramping while I jog. I thought it was just typical exercise pain, but I don't remember it happening if I get to the treadmill first thing in the morning, or, like last night, 3 hours after dinner.

Yesterday, I had an appointment, so I only got a little bit of weight training in in the morning. Then I was bored in the evening, and felt bad about not getting a full workout, so I went to the gym. I was going to lift weights, but, for some reason, I heard the treadmill calling. It was the first time that I've actually been annoyed when the treadmill program slowed down.

Tonight, my 8 year old is the opening act in a talent show for the school. Tickets include a spaghetti dinner, and the parents have contributed desserts. I made nanaimo bars. :eat: There's more than half a pound of butter in them. It was physically difficult for me to put that much fat into my baking (I actually substituted 2 T of the butter for yogurt in the crust.) I could have made something low fat, but that wouldn't have been much fun. I'll save the low fat desserts for when I'm planning to eat the whole thing. :spaz:

The talent show was great. They had so many desserts that they sent mine back home with me. I will have to take them out when I go out this weekend. I ate four or five little dainties, and they were yummy. I have trouble understanding though why I was so hungry at bedtime even though I estimated about 2200 calories consumed yesterday and normally I'm at maybe 1700.

A delicious post workout snack: Put about 2 tsp ground flax seeds and 2 tsp wheat germ in a bowl (this would be even better with 1 T of ground walnuts). Mix together, then dip a banana in it. Drink a large glass of cold milk alongside. :eat:

I did the treadmill again this morning. I can't seem to be able to keep off that thing. I read the manual and I think I will try Running Program 1. It is the same speeds that I have been going at, but must be longer at the higher speeds and shorter at the lower speeds. The program is an hour long, but I can cut it short. I'd feel better about my workout progress if I had a new challenge. If that doesn't work, maybe I'll go back to the jogging program but boost the incline up by 1 degree.

I think I have about as much chance getting smaller thighs as getting smaller knees. :rolleyes: However, I think they must be more muscular. It's hard to remember what I looked like a month ago. I will take photos in a few days to compare, but I'm not sure whether I'll post them.

Fresh strawberries and fresh cherries are available in the city. I've been buying pineapple and melon too. And wow, I found this incredible treat. It's called quark and fruit. I got cherry yesterday, and I sent someone today to buy me another cherry and a strawberry. Tastes exactly like a fluffy cheescake. In 100g it has about 100 calories and about 4 grams of fat. I might start eating this stuff by the caseload. I'm having trouble finding the calcium content though. I'd like to know if this is an appropriate substitute for yogurt, because I hate yogurt.

I did it again. Every time I leave the gym it is 1 degree warmer than when I left it. Today was 21 when I came in and 22 degrees by the time I leave. I will have to ask if they have an air conditioner. I don't want it much hotter than that.

The running program was nice. I may even like it better than the jogging program. At one spot, I have to decrease it from 9km/h to 6 km/h for two minutes, then instead of speeding up at the end as the program leads me to, I bump it down to my cool down.

I took some pics yesterday, but I'm not really ecstatic about them. They don't seem to show very much change, yet I see change in the mirror. The camera adds ten pounds? I'm thinking I should maybe post them just to prove that even if you don't see change, it's still possible to be improving - to be making strength gains, endurance gains, and general health improvements - and to feel good about yourself.

Oops, never mind.

Bad camera day.

I just had to know, so I took some more shots. They turned out fine and show lots of progress. :rolleyes:

Last night, I ate too much, drank too much, and stayed up too late....

My husband and I went to a disco and had a blast. I had a glass of wine with dinner about 7:00, then three beers between 9:00 and 2:00. And I got SO drunk. Funny, I used to drink four or five drinks every Friday, and it didn't do much.

Today, my husband turns 32. We took him out for lunch. I had pasta with spicy tomato sauce, then we took the girls to buy ice cream bars. I had an ice cream sandwich myself.

Stats from mybodycomp for today compared to three months ago.
Height 64.49 in (1.64 m) 64.49 in (1.64 m)
Weight 123 lbs (56.00 kg) 118 lbs (53.60 kg) -5 lbs (-2.40 Kg)
Neck 13.50 in (34.30 cm) 13.19 in (33.50 cm) -0.31 in (-0.80 cm)
Shoulder 43.50 in (110.5 cm) 40.75 in (103.5 cm) -2.76 in (-7.0 cm)
Chest 35.98 in (91.40 cm) 33.15 in (84.20 cm) -2.83 in (-7.20 cm)
Waist 27.01 in (68.60 cm) 25.79 in (65.50 cm) -1.22 in (-3.10 cm)
Abdomen 27.99 in (71.10 cm) 26.65 in (67.70 cm) -1.34 in (-3.40 cm)
Hips 35.00 in (88.90 cm) 33.46 in (85.00 cm) -1.54 in (-3.90 cm)
Thigh 21.89 in (55.60 cm) 21.85 in (55.50 cm) -0.04 in (-0.10 cm)
Knee 14.02 in (35.60 cm) 13.39 in (34.00 cm) -0.63 in (-1.60 cm)
Calf 14.76 in (37.50 cm) 14.25 in (36.20 cm) -0.51 in (-1.30 cm)
Ankle 8.27 in (21.00 cm) 7.99 in (20.30 cm) -0.28 in (-0.70 cm)
Arm 11.50 in (29.20 cm) 10.04 in (25.50 cm) -1.46 in (-3.70 cm)
Forearm 9.61 in (24.40 cm) 9.25 in (23.50 cm) -0.35 in (-0.90 cm)
Wrist 6.18 in (15.70 cm) 6.18 in (15.70 cm)

Initial figures are from mid February, about a month after I started lifting weights and eating better. The weight I pretty much made up, because I don't have a scale. I weigh myself at the doctor's office, but I'm always wearing different clothes and shoes, always a different time of day and everything.

The report says my body fat has gone from 23.54 % to 20.51 % This doesn't mean much to me. They say the average woman has 23% body fat, but that doesn't sound right to me. I understand the average woman is a size 12 or 14, and I was a size 6 or 8 with the 23.54% calculation.

Everything has gotten smaller except for my thighs. I even lost a cm off my neck. This really is not funny. :( If I could have picked ONE place to lose inches, it would have been the thighs. I DO NOT WANT A SMALLER WAIST! I REALLY DO NOT WANT A SMALLER CHEST!!

Actually, I was surprised the biceps are smaller. From my pics, you can see I have a LOT more muscle in my arm. It must not be measurable in it's relaxed state. :confused:

I don't think the absolute value of body fat percentage matters as much as the relative value. According to mybodycomp.com, you lost about 3% body fat, which is superb. On a woman who is already trim, 3% makes a big difference--the waist becomes more accentuated and all the muscles look more defined.

Your biceps may have decreased because you lost fat from your arms. My biceps have stayed the same size over the last few months (measuring them flexed), but I am much stronger now. At the same time as you gain muscle, you are peeling away layers of fat.

My thighs are also the last place for fat to hide. I don't want them to be any bigger, so I've stopped doing the leg component of my weight training. I realize that an increase in butt and leg mass can increase one's metabolism, but it's more important to me that they are physically smaller, whatever the proportion of muscle and fat. The women I see with big calves and muscular thighs remind me of rugby players, and it looks very masculine. You should realize that the only way to remove fat from your thighs is through calorie restriction, but that would cause you to lose fat all over. You could also do liposuction, but from your pictures I think this is just a fixation on your part. If you can somehow find a way to not hate them, do it. Don't wear clothes that make you hate them more. Get a skirt that hides your thighs but accentuates your slender calves.

You look beautiful in the photos you posted. It's hard to believe you were pregnant twice before looking like this.

In January, February, March, I was doing three sets of lunges two or three times a week, and occasionally some other leg exercises, but mostly just arms and shoulders. With no strikingly aparent results from this, I actually decided to increase my leg workouts with dumbbell bench step-ups, butt lifts, and squats in addition to the lunges. I'm happier with the results I've gotten from the month or so I've been at it, because I have lost some fat from my thighs, but the muscle came right in to replace it.

One of my friends has a daughter who's a bodybuilder, and she was saying she has such a hard time finding pants. I'm not sure I ever could be a body builder just because I'd hate to get bigger thighs.

It's almost like a game I'm playing. How much weight do I have to lose before my thighs shrink?????????? I know I don't need lipsuction, I just need to focus on other body parts and understand that I'll always have a little extra there. Maybe I should again drop the leg workouts now that I've got some muscle built up there.

My calves, by the way, are not slender (I searched the whole city for boots that could fit over them!), but for some reason, they're not as hard to love.

both pics from a couple of days ago - unflexed and flexed

You dont have fat thighs. They look tight and smooth to me.

And great calfs as well. Not a bit oversized and very feminine. :)

You look beautiful in the photos you posted. It's hard to believe you were pregnant twice before looking like this.

Thank-you Trinity.

A few words about beauty:
When I was a younger, when I thought of the perfect body, I thought of the body on magazine covers, on television, in the movies. I suppose I wanted to look like Cindy Crawford or Christie Brinkley.

As I got older, what I considered beautiful started to change.

To me, a body like Jelena's or Serena Williams is more beautiful than a body like Jennifer Lopez. And as long as I believe I am beautiful, I become more beautiful in the way that I interact. Funny how that works.

Wonderful Tonight
by Eric Clapton
It's late in the evening; she's wondering what clothes to wear.
She puts on her make-up and brushes her long blonde hair.
And then she asks me, "Do I look all right?"
And I say, "Yes, you look wonderful tonight."

We go to a party and everyone turns to see
This beautiful lady that's walking around with me.
And then she asks me, "Do you feel all right?"
And I say, "Yes, I feel wonderful tonight."

I feel wonderful because I see
The love light in your eyes.
And the wonder of it all
Is that you just don't realize how much I love you.

It's time to go home now and I've got an aching head,
So I give her the car keys and she helps me to bed.
And then I tell her, as I turn out the light,
I say, "My darling, you were wonderful tonight.
Oh my darling, you were wonderful tonight."

You dont have fat thighs. They look tight and smooth to me.

I'm going to keep telling myself that until I believe it. :p

The progress is I like my thighs much better this month than last month. Wouldn't it be wonderful if next month I like them even more?

Today I like my thighs better than yesterday. That's progress.

I am a runner! :claplow:

Before Christmas months ago I could not run. Not for more than about a minute. (I could walk for hours, and was in okay shape, but no running thanks.) Now, I can actually do 45 minutes of a running program on a treadmill. Wow, I've come so far.

I like my cardio workouts much better than my weight workouts. Maybe this is just because I'd still rather lose fat than gain muscle. Or it could be because I've been lifting the same weights for so long and don't feel like I'm getting anywhere. Today was weight day, and I did a nice long workout at home, then walked to the gym, and did a short workout there for my back. I really didn't feel complete so I went on the treadmill for 25 minutes. Lately I've been skipping my weight workouts completely in favor of cardio. I'll try to just allow myself to accept that, since I'm still seeing the results I want. Or, it could be time to change my weight lifting routine.

Food is delicious. :eat: I've given up my increased protein goal, and I'm going all out on the fruit. Strawberries are in season, and I've been buying fresh pineapple and melon even though they are really expensive. Fullness is improved, and my sugar craving is satisfied like never before. I need some more vegetables, though, and it's not as easy to find delicious vegetables as fruit. Today, I think I will make the practically fat free orange poppyseed dressing.

Cooking for the family is still hard. They don't want to eat the healthy food I am cooking, and won't suggest what I should make them instead. And no way am I volunteering to make a pepperoni pizza, the only thing I am sure that they would eat. I feel like a short order cook. Last night it was salmon with carrots, red pepper, and orange for me with a few baked potato wedges, hot beef sandwich for older daughter, potato wedges for younger daughter, baked spring rolls and cheese sandwich for husband (the spring rolls and beef were left over, and he made his own sandwich)

Guava, can I have that orange poppyseed dressing? I love poppyseed dressing, but the bottled kind is pretty fatty.

I hope my kids will eat what I make. I don't deal well with even a hint of criticism about my food, and I certainly don't have the energy to make something different for everyone. When I was in high school I would sometimes cook for my parents, but if I didn't get it just right my dad would turn up his nose and make a sandwich. Que es este? You don't like what I've made?! Do you think your kids are just used to the way you used to cook, or is healthy food inherently unappealing to kids? I hope they are trainable. There is no way we're going to keep junk food around the house when we have kids. For one, my husband and I would eat it. For two, I want our kids to be fit and healthy!

Zesty Orange Poppyseed Dressing (http://forums.johnstonefitness.com/showthread.php?t=2350)

I love to cook, so although I complain about making 8 different things for supper, I don't mind it so much, other than the huge amount of time that it takes, and the trouble that I have synchronizing the time.

Tonight, I want a Moroccan chicken with prunes dish and curried rice with raisins. I know the family won't be impressed, so I think I'll be making them chicken nuggets.

Lunch today is homemade gnocchi for everyone else. I'll probably get tuna or maybe just a salad.

You seem like a pretty fantastic cook. Everytime I read a post about your cooking my mouth waters. :drool:

Okay, I'm DEFINITELY making this after I get back to my boyfriend's place. I love salad, especially in the summer. This sounds fantastic! :drool:

Yes, the dressing's great. Had it for lunch today. And for supper today was this fabulous meal.
Chicken with Prunes and Curried Rice with Raisins (http://forums.johnstonefitness.com/showthread.php?p=45155#post45155)

I started cooking when I was about twelve. By the time I was fourteen, I was cooking meals about once a week. Before I moved out, I was a better cook than my mom.

And don't get me started on desserts. I love to bake, but I'm just not eating the baking anymore. I have cheesecake, two different kinds of cakes, butter tarts, and nanaimo bars in the freezer, besides my orange bran flax muffins, sugarless bars, banana bread, and homemade bread.

Wow! That looks great! Impressive. You should teach classes.

Let me describe you something...

I'm at work. Looking at my pc screen... and suddenly... THAT PICTURE!!!

This is so NOT FAIR!!!! :drool:

My workouts go so much better on Saturdays. I thought it was because I was doing it in a fasted state, but I think it's mostly state of mind.

Last night we went out for dinner. I had the strangest fish with almond sauce. It wasn't bad, wasn't really good - rather "interesting". It's sort of sad that I'm never hungry enough to have dessert. I'm going to have to just do it as a meal replacement sometime when I need a treat.

My husband took the time this morning to let me know that I make his life more enjoyable. :D When he doesn't tell me, I forget sometimes.

So the treadmill went really great. Even the 17th and 18th minute, which I always cheat on, I breezed right through today. Still didn't make it for the full hour, but I'm not even sure that's necessary anymore. I think I'll stick to 45 minutes, and as the next goal, run faster. I already know now that I'll be running faster in a month. This is why I love the treadmill more than running. I can track my progress so much more accurately. I don't know if the heart rate monitor is accurate, but at one point, it put me at 198 pulse, so I slowed down. Normally, I've been about 135-140 at 7km/h, and about 160 or 170 at 9 km/h.

Thursday I found the perfect pair of pants. Black with a white pinstripe. I had to take them in by about 2 inches in the waist. I have a lot of practice doing that. But now, when trying on pants, instead of whining "these pants are too tight in the butt" I can whine "these pants are too big in the waist".

Even better, I found the perfect top to go with the pants the following day. It has black and white diagonal stripes.

Last night, I bought four new t-shirts, because all of my old ones seem to be unflatteringly baggy now. Most of them I bought four years ago anyway, so it was time for a wardrobe update. Annoyingly, they are just a little tight in the bicep area, but I can live with that.

I tried to bake some beans yesterday (with Dr. Pepper!) and they didn't turn out. My friends say it should be more like six hours than the two hours my recipe called for. They're back in the oven today. I hope they're not ruined.

Must go out today and buy cherries. The man in front of me at the market got the last of them yesterday, and the kids are going fruit crazy on me lately. :p

I think we'll barbecue tonight. Watermelon would be nice, but it's better to wait until the local ones are available than to be buying the expensive imported ones.

Got my first copy of Prevention magazine in the mail. One thing I love about it is that the models they use are always so beautiful, gives me inspiration of how I could look. Some great health and exercise tips, and recipes are fabulous as well. :tu:

I've got fruit covering every inch of the house.

Or maybe it just seems that way. Yesterday, I bought a pound of cherries, cut them up and froze them (it's best this way, because sometimes I find worms in them).Then my friend called me, she has strawberries from her mom. How many do I want? Why did I say seven pounds? So I washed about half of them yesterday and cut up and froze about half of what I washed. I've been debating trying to dehydrate them, but I don't have a dehydrator, and I don't know how well it would work in the oven, especially since it is rainy season.

On top of that, yesterday I made bread again. Man, what a busy day, but nice, satisfying.

My kids have both got a touch of the cold. I feel it coming on me in the throat.

Goal check:

1) increase cardiovascular endurance (make it through the 45 minute jogging program on the treadmill)
2) continue to increase muscular strength
3) eat to nourish my body instead of eat to look good
4) encourage my family to become active with me
5) continue to shift my family's diet to a more healthy one

1) I've made it through the 45 minute jogging program on the treadmill 10 times. :tu: Now I'm trying to work my way through the 60 minute running program. It is getting easier, but it's slow

2) Strength? I don't know. I'm still lifting the same dumbbells. :( Maybe they're a little easier to hoist, but not much. Not sure what to do about this goal. :confused: However, I've noticed that my back workouts at the gym are easier than they were before. And my muscles are definitely showing more definition. Perhaps I need to buy some really tiny plates and see if I can add them on to my dumbbells while still being able to keep good form.

3) My diet is focused on fruit. I always eat when I'm hungry. I love the food that I'm eating.

4) The girls come for a walk with me at least once a week. We'll be going swimming more in the next few weeks.

5) There is less salami and cheese in the house. I don't think we have any chips in the house either. I had a five minute talk yesterday with my daughter about why fat free chocolate pudding was a better choice than crackers. We looked at the new food guide, and she was excited to see that nuts are a healthy choice. We talked about the difference between whole grains and refined like rice and white bread. She eats the bread I make with flax seeds in it. I'm trying to get her to try barley. My husband is eating vegetables at every meal, partly due to the fact that I give him at least two options of vegetables. The kids eat either fruit or vegetables at each meal.

Want your family to eat better? Tell the kids that a healthful diet will make them look gorgeous. This was one of the most successful strategies in a recent family nutrition study.-Prevention Magazine

New goals:
1) Find better substitutes for white rice, white bread, and pasta that the kids will enjoy.
2) Learn new ways to prepare vegetables to make them more appealing.
3) Drink more water. (My water consumption is exceptionally low, so my goal for now is 1.5 liters per day.)
4) Keep increasing speed and/or duration of runs.
5) Spend more time outdoors and less time on the computer.
6) Love my thighs ;)

Yesterday, I bought a pound of cherries, cut them up and froze them (it's best this way, because sometimes I find worms in them).


I swear I was just finishing a bowl of fresh cherries when I read this. :o
At least it was dark, so if there were any, I didn't see them. Thanks for ruining it for me now guava! :lol:

Jason

You're probably okay, txitalian. They don't use pesticides in any of the fruits and vegetables here. And I ate loads of cherries last year before I realized they had so many worms in them. :p But think of all the extra protein! (I didn't however find any in the ones I cut open last week - maybe only the end of the season)

I have been so extremely hungry today. Breakfast was a third of a large whole wheat burger bun with homemade almond butter and raspberry jam on it with a big glass of milk. Before lunch, I had half and apple, half a banana, half a light yogurt with a bit of granola on top. For lunch noodles with stir fry veggies and shrimp. (This is SO delicious, I've made it for three meals in a row.) After lunch, had a slice of strawberry cream pie (Yummy, see the recipe forum). Still hungry, so I had half a banana. Still hungry so I had another third of a hamburger bun with almond butter on it. Still hungry so I ate another third same way, but with ground flax seeds sprinkled on top. Still hungry so I'm eating some barley cooked in orange juice with raisins and pears.

I tried to figure out why I'm so hungry, so I logged my food into fit day, and I'm still only at 1100 calories for the day. It seemed like a lot of food, but it was high volume low calories, I guess. Should have eaten more shrimp, I suppose. My protein could use a boost, but I prefer carbs, so I'll stick with what I love.

I've got a bit of a cold, and that seems to make me crave sugar and milk even more than I normally do (and I normally eat a lot of them). I don't even like yogurt and I've eaten two containers between today and yesterday.

I'm again at a bit of a shift in my priorities. I'm getting bored of focusing so much on physical fitness. It's starting to feel like hard work and I'm not enjoying it anymore. I don't want to think "I have to eat this. I have to lift that. I can't eat those. I shouldn't do that." Anyway, I think the point of this whole journey has been to get in the best possible shape for the summer, so that I have a bit of a cushion so that I can relax a bit more in regards to what I eat and what I do. I don't have to go on the treadmill every day, and I can eat pizza once in a while. I hardly ever crave crazy things like nachos, ice cream, even chocolate anymore. I feel antsy if I don't go out for a mile-long walk every day in addition to whatever working out I've done. It's such a relief to be happy with what I enjoy eating and to be healthy from what I enjoy doing. Well, anyway, I'm happy today.

Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get. :nod:

I'm happy today too, but not as happy. I'm terribly bloated, my waist is about an inch bigger than normal. This makes me feel like I should cut back on my food intake, and then I get hungry and miserable. I don't have a scale, but I ordered one, and it should be here in a few weeks. I don't know if that will make things better or worse. Does a bigger waist mean weight gain? Should I balance out the weight gain with reduction in calories? Am I bloating from PMS and a cold?

It's comforting to know that even if I relax my diet and exercise routine, the "worst" I will slip back to is how I looked last summer, which was still "not bad". However, I'd really like to maintain what I've worked so hard to become.

I hope it's just this cold that's got me down, and I'll be back on track next week.

Trinity's journal entry for today (http://forums.johnstonefitness.com/showthread.php?p=47185#post47185)is what I would have liked to have written. Normally, I'm like this, but for today, I just don't believe it.
Sometimes I wrongly believe that if I let myself go, I would naturally regress to a state of sloth and gluttony. What I've come to realize, however, is that my body actually enjoys healthy foods and activities. I feel physically ill when I consume anything in excess, whether it's green beans or Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. We've all heard that moderation is the key to healthful living. This advice bears repeating. I like the Swedish expression "lagom" as it embodies this advice: neither too little nor too much, but just right.

Quote for the day:
I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.

...my waist is about an inch bigger than normal. This makes me feel like I should cut back on my food intake, and then I get hungry and miserable.

I've been thinking about this for a while now, and I think it means that I have attained a weight that is too difficult for my body to maintain. Maybe I am too skinny. It seems that my body wants to be at a slightly higher weight than it is presently, and I'd probably be better off to listen to it, than to fight it so much.

More thoughts when my sinus congestion goes away.

Man. U have more ups and downs then a yo-yo ! ;)

I don't have a scale, but I ordered one, and it should be here in a few weeks. I don't know if that will make things better or worse. Does a bigger waist mean weight gain?

Seriously, at your weight and BF, the scales are your enemy !!! When u weigh in at 200lbs and 25% BF, the scales are a good indicator of fat loss, as the likelyhood is that any weight loss will be fat, as this person has a lot of fat. When u get down to ur weight, it will just drive you paranoid. One day you will weigh in 4lbs heavier then yesterday. The next day, you will have lost 5lbs !!! And with your mentality (Not meant to be taken as an insult, mearly an observation), i believe this will do you more harm then good. You will weigh in, and the results will be meaningless. Water weight will gain you 4 lbs and then you think u are gaining and so cut back on cals, which will result in further gains of fat due to Starvation kicking in.

Seriously. Weight dont mean nothing at your stage of the game. Do u wanna loose weight ? No. Youve said your happy atthe weight you are. Do you wanna gain weight? No. So whats the purpose of these scales? Think about it. One more unnecessary thing to worry about.

Use visual guidance or by calipers. Dont bother with the scales. :nod:

When I looked in the mirror this morning, my abs just jumped right out at me!
:claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh: :claphigh:

Who knew all it would take was a little bit of cake to coax them out?

And then, maybe because I was so pumped about the abs, I completed the 45 minute treadmill program!
:jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping: :jumping:

Today is a happy day.

Thats wierd isnt it? The same thing happened to me. I almost gave up and decided to eat whatever i wanted to 3 days and all of a sudden it seemed like my waiste size started shrinking? It doesent make sense does it...lol. But its cause we were probably under eating on our calories and when we ate the high calorie foods, out metabolisms sped up and showed us what should have been. (wierd theory, but i'm no nutritionist).

Perhaps I need to buy some really tiny plates and see if I can add them on to my dumbbells while still being able to keep good form.

Fractional plates are great. I don't know how people get by without them.

Man. U have more ups and downs then a yo-yo ! ;)

You don't know the half of it. Try spending a day in my brain and see if you don't go crazy. Hey, I'm a woman, whaddya expect?

After my week of tracking my diet on fitday, I thought I had a much better idea of what I was taking in daily. It seems it's not the case.

My throat is still sore. So I've been eating a lot of high moisture foods, just because that's what I'm craving. So it's been a lot of fruit for snacks, mostly salads for meals, puddings for desserts. I'm eating an enormous amount of food, then I wonder why I'm hungry. If I input my food into fit day, I see that I'm way low on calories, and need to be eating more. How many apples and oranges can you eat from the calories in a muffin? Lots. I wish I could just trust myself to obey my hunger again and forget about how many calories I'm consuming. I'm still wavering on the protein issue as well. If I try to increase my protein, my calories go up because I don't get as full on chicken as fruit, but I hear so many great things about protein that I feel there's something wrong with me if I get less than ideal amounts. From yesterday's diet, as recorded on fitday at about 1800 calories, I've come closer than ever to meeting all of my nutrient requirements, even though a lot of those calories came from cake (ooooooh, frozen cake, feels nice going down). Honestly, this is what I thought to be one of my WORST diet days.

It's sort of embarrassing even to post it:
Pancakes, plain 3 pancake (4" dia) 144 2 27 3
Pancake syrup, NFS 1 tablespoon 53 0 14 0
Bread, whole wheat, 1 thick slice 78 1 14 3
Peanut butter 0.6 tablespoon 57 5 2 2
Banana, raw 0.5 medium (7" to 7-7/8" long) 54 0 14 1
Chicken, breast, broiled, skin not eaten 0.75 cup, diced 166 4 0 31
Chicken, roasting, meat only, roasted 0.3 cup, chopped 70 3 0 11
White potato, NFS 1 small (1-3/4" to 2-1/4" dia, raw) 83 0 19 2
Carrots, fat added in cooking 0.5 cup, NFS 52 2 8 1
Apple, raw 0.3 cup, NFS 22 0 6 0
Flax seeds 0.04 cup 29 2 2 1
Orange, raw 0.3 cup, sections 25 0 6 1
Cake, yellow, with chocolate frosting 1 piece 243 11 35 2
Tomatoes, raw 1 cup, cherry tomato 31 0 7 1
Cucumber, raw 1 cup, NFS 14 0 3 1
Pepper, sweet, red, raw 1 cup, NFS 40 0 10 1
Onions, young green, raw 0.6 cup, chopped 19 0 4 1
Cake, plum pudding 1 slice (3" dia, 1/2" thick) 131 6 19 2
Thousand Island dressing 1.5 tablespoon 88 8 4 0
Honey 1 tablespoon 64 0 17 0
Margarine, tub, salted 0.03 cup 49 5 0 0
Cracker, 100% whole wheat 4 Triscuit 89 3 14 2
Chickpeas (garbanzo beans), mature seeds, cooked 0.1 cup 27 0 4 1
Milk, cow's, 0.5% or less butterfat 2 cup 171 1 24 17
Total Calories 1799 56 254 84
28% fat, 52% carbs, 19% protein, which is fairly typical.

I made tapioca pudding this morning. It is SO yummy, and makes my throat feel so much better. I wish I liked tea. Maybe with some cinnamon or something....

Interesting. Your macronutrient breakdown and number of calories is almost exactly the diet I recommended to my mother. Then again, you weigh less than she does.

FrenchSpirit, maybe if your mom keeps at that diet, she'll end up looking like me! :D I'm pretty sure I'm eating at around maintenance. However, as you age, your metabolism slows. I feel bad for my mom. She was eating like a bird, and still was heavier than I was when I was eating freely. For older people, weight training is even more important. Does she lift weights?

Yesterday another cooking experiment. A chicken and broccoli braid. Original recipe called for crescent roll dough and 1/2 C mayo, but I used a homemade bread dough with whole wheat flour and ground flax seeds in it, and substituted the mayo for 1/4 C each yogurt and fat free cream cheese. I also reduced the grated cheddar from a cup to just a few tablespoons. The end result was a little bland :rolleyes: but my husband actually said it wasn't bad other than that. We spread mustard on it, and I liberally sprinkled celery salt on it, which improved it tenfold. I put the info into fitday, and, damn, it's a well balanced meal. :tu: I could eat the entire recipe as my day's intake (okay, then, 90% of it), and I'd be good to go.

Flour, white 1.75 cup 796 2 167 23
Flax seeds 0.188 cup 135 9 10 5
Wheat germ, plain 0.0625 cup 27 1 4 2
Egg, whole, cooked, 1 large 84 6 1 6
Buttermilk, fluid, 2% fat 0.25 cup 34 1 3 3
Yeast 0.5 tablespoon, dry 18 0 2 2
Sugar, NFS 1 teaspoon 16 0 4 0
Olive oil 1 tablespoon 119 14 0 0
Chicken, breast, broiled, skin not eaten 1 cup, diced 221 5 0 42
Chicken, roasting, 1 cup, chopped or diced 234 9 0 35
Broccoli, frozen, spears, unprepared 0.5 package (10 oz) 41 0 8 4
Yogurt, plain, whole milk 0.5 cup (8 fl oz) 75 4 6 4
Cheese, processed cream cheese product, nonfat 0.5 cup 120 2 7 18
Onions, young green, raw 0.25 cup, chopped 8 0 2 0
Total Calories 1929 53 213 144
26% fat, 43% carb 31% protein

Seven days of no exercise makes one weak.

Actually, I only went two days of no exercise, but still it was pretty depressing, since I'm used to working out seven days a week. My throat is still sore, so I'm still gobbling down the tapioca pudding and overloading on fruit. Coffee is tasting wonderful, but the caffeine gives me stomach cramps so I have to really limit myself.

Today I did the dumbbell bench step ups and some straight arm pulldowns before getting on the treadmill. I did the jogging program that I used to do. Several months ago I wouldn't have been able to do it with a sore throat like this.

I'm still a little bloated, but I've accepted that it's just bloating, and I won't always look this puffy. Even if it is real weight gain then when my health improves, the weight will stabilise to its healthy level. I am more concerned with staying at a healthy weight (Except in my vain moments. :whistle: ) instead of at a weight where I think I look good, so I'm trying to allow my hunger again to dictate when and how much I eat.

Yes, I'm obsessed with my weight.

:rolleyes:

This was my husband's accusation last night.

The last couple of days have been rough because I haven't been able to do what I normally do, but usually, my weight obsession simply ensures that I am doing what is best for my body - my health and my appearance. I think that almost everyone who visits these forums is obsessed with their weight. Every morsel of food that goes into my mouth is given deep thought. I feel empty if I can't get in as much exercise as I feel I need. I get anxious if I'm not doing my normal workouts.

Weight training day today. I did two sets of bicep curls, a set of side laterals, a set of lunges, a set of tricep extensions. And I hated every second of it. So I said "Why am I doing this to myself?" and jumped into a nice warm shower. I went out for a walk for some fruits, then I made another strawberry cream pie, this one with the cottage cheese and fat free cream cheese instead of the milk. Bought some throat lozenges, and ate a big bowl of strawberries and bananas. I suppose lunch today should be a big bowl of chicken soup. Or maybe I'll just eat the pie. :eat:

Hopefully I can get out for a nice long walk again this evening. I need a really big perk up. :flex:

Either you run the day or the day runs you. -Jim Rohn

Guava, you and I are very similar. How good I feel is inversely proportional to the number of pounds I weigh. There's a very fine line between being concerned about your health and being obsessed, however. Sometimes it's difficult to know when you've crossed it. If your concern about your fitness and appearance interferes with your ability to enjoy the rest of your life, then it might be time to think about reevaluating priorities. Mental health is just as important as physical health, so do what you need to do to be happy.

Keeping busy takes my mind off of my appearance and exercise/eating habits. During the school year, when I'm racing back and forth to class, writing, and researching, I barely have time to catch my breath, let alone dwell on how much I weigh. It's times like these in the summer, on the other hand, when I am more likely to obsess simply because I don't have a million assignments breathing down my neck.

My advice is to fill the time in your day when you'd normally be thinking about your appearance with a constructive activity: organize the fall craft fair, run for a PTA office, volunteer at your girls' school, or build a swing set in the back yard. This will channel your energies in a positive, self-affirming manner rather than toward something over which you have little control.

Thanks Trinity. That's very helpful. It's true, I'm obsessing about my weight because I'm not busy enough.

Unfortunately, if I'm not obsessing about my weight, I usually switch to obsessing about something else. What I need is more balance in my life, and more variety in my activities. Those are great suggestions you had.

I DID volunteer to organize for a outdoor celebration that's going on in a few weeks. I got 8 mothers to volunteer to supervise an activity for that day. (I'm doing an "Alphabet Race" where I have to call out a letter of the alphabet, and the kids have to get together and form that letter.) Also, tomorrow I have a women's association meeting, which I have to make coffee for, and take minutes for.

I keep saying I should pick up my cross-stitching again, or at least do some reading, but those sound like pretty boring things for the summer. I'll have to be dragging the kids to the pool more often; weather must get warmer soon.

:lol: now I'm excited about finding new things to distract myself from my obsession.

Yep, I've been living in Romania.

Almost three years now. At least I'm not whining to go home every week now. (Thanks in a large part to my new fitness routine. :) )

So, living in Romania makes things a little different than they were for me in Canada. I'm envious that I can't pop over to the corner store for some fat free mayo, that I can't sample all the new exotic salad dressings, that there are no healthy crackers or cereals available (I wanna try Kashi!), and that all of the cheese here is full fat (so even chicken and vegetable pizza is definitely a high fat splurge). Never mind natural peanut butter, I think there's only about five stores in this country that sell peanut butter. (It's not even very good.) My fresh vegetable choices amount to about 12 things, which vary slightly seasonally; fruits about the same. I buy what's in season, or the limited amount of frozen stuff that's around, but not everything is available. (I want some blueberries!!!!) I can't even buy a decent loaf of whole wheat bread, so that's why I've started making from scratch. (If I can ever find a health food store that sells whole wheat flour again.) I bring back scads of stuff from Canada - peanut butter, barley, wheat germ, flour tortillas, Jello and pudding mixes, pizza sauce, sugar twin - but I'm rather stuck on the perishables.

So, I compromise. Right now, I'd like to do a recipe with cottage cheese, fat free cream cheese, and sugar free Jello. I can get the fat free cream cheese, miracle of all miracles, I've just recently been able to locate cottage cheese (must be the full fat variety, but I don't see any nutritional information on it), and I'm all out of Jello until I go back to Canada in August. I'm wondering if I can somehow adapt it to use unflavored gelatin with a packet of Crystal Light that I brought with me.

So it's harder to watch your weight here than in Canada, but, paradoxically, it's also harder to gain the weight too. There's a McDonald's about an hour away, but it doesn't tempt me as much as Dairy Queen. My Tim Horton's fondness is a nonissue in this country, and the restaurants don't make any decent cheesecakes or brownies. Advertising has less of an influence, and it focuses more on beauty products than food anyway. Besides, I don't watch tv, and all my magazines are from Canada, so what they're advertising I can't have anyway.

On the other hand, the average young Romanian woman is about a size 6, and they stock the stores with very limited quantities, in the items that they think they can sell. A year ago, it was hit and miss with the clothes. If I could get the pants up past my hips, I'd buy them. Now I can fit most of the things in the stores.

If I were in Canada, I may not have ever lost this weight. I would have believed people when they said I was too skinny, and it would have been reflected in my difficulty to fit into the clothes in the mainstream stores. (Sears online sizing guide says that their smallest size, a 6, is too big for me.) But here, I'm average. I'm harder on myself, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.

This bikini was 60% off at Sears online. I couldn't resist, so I ordered it, and my mom will pick it up for me. I'll get to try it on in August. Hope it fits. http://image.sears.ca/icat/84/01/173584017.fpx?cell=80&cvt=jpeg

I put the [img] tags in there, but it insists on making it a link; it just will NOT insert images for me. I've had this trouble before. Anyone know why?

{IMG} http://us.i1.yimg.com/us.yimg.com/i/ww/m6v9b.gif {/IMG}

strange, with the code above i can insert an image. of course, with standard brackets instead of the weird curly things.

The problem must be that I don't have the correct image name. It ends in cvt=jpeg not .jpeg

I did this by right clicking on the image and selecting properties. Is this not the right way?

Someone please try inserting my image, then tell me how you did it.

If you do fit the clothes in the stores here, you gotta love it.

I had a date to go shopping with my girlfriend this morning, so I did my workout earlier, on the bike we have at home instead of going to the gym. I hate the bike. I cycled for 15 minutes, until it said I burned 100 calories, then I did six laps around my apartment block, maybe 300 m, alternating walking jogging rounds.

Shopping went well. Prices can't be beat. The only thing that's weird is buying the underwear that says XXL size 36. Ha, but for a dollar, you can't complain too much. It's not surprising that I have a closet full of clothes that I'll probably only ever wear once.

Tonight I go shopping again, to the city, with my husband, so that we can stock up on meat, frozen vegetables, and milk. Supper will probably be Pizza Hut. Pizza Hut Express, that would be. No salads available. Not really what I'm in the mood for, but if I bring a muffin with me instead, and opt to eat fruit that I buy at the grocery store, he'll tease me about being too healthy. :( Tomorrow we have a pizza party at the pool. It's impossible to avoid that stuff. :p

Goal check:
1) Find better substitutes for white rice, white bread, and pasta that the kids will enjoy.
2) Learn new ways to prepare vegetables to make them more appealing.
3) Drink more water. (My water consumption is exceptionally low, so my goal for now is 1.5 liters per day.)
4) Keep increasing speed and/or duration of runs.
5) Spend more time outdoors and less time on the computer.
6) Love my thighs

I haven't done so well on these goals yet.
1) Bread, rice, and pasta? No change.
2) The vegetables are appealing to me, and I think they are getting more appealing to my husband, but the girls won't bite yet.
3) I'm drinking a tiny bit more water than I used to.
4) Runs are taking a backslide.
5) Some improvement here.
6) I love how my thighs look in one of the new pair of pants I bought. That's a start.

Not a good week for diet. I can't recognize my hunger cues. Still bloated. Eating lots of fruit.
Not a good week for exercise. My allergies are bothering me - throat a bit sore and nose stuffed up. Routine is getting boring, but last time I tried to change it, it felt worse.
My older daughter has started to come with me on my evening walks to get fruits and vegetables. Sometimes my husband and younger daughter will come too. I asked her what she wanted to take for lunch tomorrow. We were looking at two different yogurts in the fridge and she said "Which one is healthier?" so we picked out the lower fat one. I don't want her to obsess about calories, but I don't want her to be blind about nutrition like I was.

This week, I've become aware that I'm a happier person than many of my neighbors. Last week my husband told me that someone told him they are happier because I am here. :D

"If you can only count on one person, let it be yourself."

We have a friend that is an incredible cook....we had dinner with him and his wife a few weeks ago and he made beats with olive oil, basil, tyme, lime, and garlic...and they were incredible. Beats = good was not a dietary equation I would have agreed with until then.

I've decided to dedicate some time to REALLY learning how to cook...if I could cook like him I would not only enjoy it more but be the healthiest dude on the planet.

I am revitalised. My allergies and/or cold has diminished, bloating has subsided, and my waist is (again/still) at 25.5 inches. :claplow:

My daughter went on a field trip to a farm yesterday. She came home with a liter of cream. What the heck am I going to do with that? :eek:

After another evening on the treadmill, I feel like I can rule the world. Maybe mornings are not my best time.

It was 25 degrees in that gym. :bb: I'm going to have to go and talk to the building manager to find out if there is air conditioning and why it is not on.

Forgot my quote for the day:

Only the bold do what they want
- from a book that my daughter is reading to me

When I opened up the "cream" my daughter brought home from the farm, I realized it was whipping cream. I made "Five Minute Ice cream" with some of it, (blend frozen strawberries with sugar and whipping cream. Done.) then I put the rest of it in small containers in the freezer to use up slowly at a later date.

I saw a man on a hot tin roof yesterday. He was barefoot. Curious.

Bought MORE clothes yesterday. I found a pair of shorts. The lady shrugged her shoulders when I asked what size they were. The label inside said age 14. Tried them on and they fit, but too big in the waist. Makes sense, I was bigger than this when I was fourteen. :eek: Anyway, the other pair of capri pants I almost bought were a size 30. Numbers means nothing.

Too much food in the fridge. So instead of oats for breakfast, I've been eating leftovers. My husband cringed when he saw me eating a salmon pita wrap with Diet Coke for breakfast.

He's lost 1.5 kg in the last month. :claplow: I knew eventually he'd start eating those salads I put in front of him.

The scale arrived today! When I first got on it, it said 53.5 kg 15% body fat. Then first thing this morning, it says 52.7 18.6% body fat. Wild. I repeat, numbers mean nothing. It has this rating it gives you too, whether underfat, overfat, and at both those measurements it indicated ideal.

Keeping your body healthy is an expression of gratitude to the whole cosmos - the trees, the clouds, everything. --Thich Nhat Hanh

Your updates are so fun to read, you have a great conversational style of writing.

It is rather pleasant!

-Allen

The problem must be that I don't have the correct image name. It ends in cvt=jpeg not .jpeg

I did this by right clicking on the image and selecting properties. Is this not the right way?

Someone please try inserting my image, then tell me how you did it.
You need to right-click and 'save image as'. By looking at the properties, you will be seeing other information if the code is generated by a server side script. That's why you're seeing the equal sign instead of a file designation.

If you want to link to just a photo on a website, the file must be located in a known directory to you. So you may not be able to link directly to an image in the same way that I can't directly link to your image since I don't know where exactly John keeps it on his servers. Chances are that your image is in a database and each time you see it you are actually looking at a link to the file and not the image itself. That's what makes server side programming so kickass, but i suspect that you don't really care too much about it.

If you want to know the location of an image, you have to only point to images on basic HTML pages or save the image and host it yourself on a free hosting service (like whoisemma does)

Thanks Nico. That was really bugging me that I couldn't figure it out.

On to my new journal (http://forums.johnstonefitness.com/showthread.php?t=5762)

Well, seeing as this noob clearly lost interest and is no longer around, I've decided (to swipe an idea from Phil) to set up shop in this here journal and see what is hidden in the drywall or burie din the backyard(so to speak)...

Anyone wanna stop in for a drink or two come on in.

If the house is a rocking, don't bother knockin!!!!

THEIF! TRASSPASSER!

Just because canadians don't sleep with loaded shotguns under their pillows like americans do, does not give you the right to hijack their threads :)

Shahar.

THEIF! TRASSPASSER!

Just because canadians don't sleep with loaded shotguns under their pillows like americans do, does not give you the right to hijack their threads :)

Shahar.

"I" before "E," except after "C" my friend. Your complaint noted, logged and soon forgotten.

:p

***?

You update your own journal about twice a month...and you're going to hijack guava's old jounal?

:blank:

You update your own journal about twice a month...and you're going to hijack guava's old jounal?

:blank:

I'm neither as verbose as you nor as needy. :whistle:

Besides, my journal's all 'fitness-y' and stuff.

I can't even spell in hebrew leave me alone, :cry:

Besides, my journal's all 'fitness-y' and stuff.

:sleep:

I can't even spell in hebrew leave me alone, :cry:

See that... you made my hebrew-speaking friend cry. :nope:

<edit> the thread-jacking idea wasn't my idea... I just was repeating something I heard on TV.