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phillydude
Fri, May 12th, 2006, 04:25 PM
Cashtration: The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

Bozone Layer: The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating.

Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.

Karmageddon: When everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes and it's a bummer.

Decafalon: The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only caffeine free beverages.

Glibido: All talk and no action.

Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

Arachnoleptic fit: The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

Beezlebug: Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

Caterpallor: The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.

Testiculating: Talking while waving your arms around like a dick.

Blamestorming: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

Assmosis: The process by which people seem to absorb success and advancement by sucking up to the boss.

Adminisphere: The rarefied organisational layers beginning just above the rank and file.

Ohnosecond: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realise that you've just made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all'),

M@
Fri, May 12th, 2006, 04:37 PM
disabeer - When you set your drink down and instantly forget where the hell you put it.