John, I found your message of the day today to be a breath of rationale air in an atmosphere of ever-increasing body obsessiveness.

I've been thinking a lot lately about how out of control our culture's body perfection obsession has become in the last few years. It used to be primarily women who were subjected to this multimedia barrage inciting them to strive for the perfect body at all costs, but now men are being told that they too should be just as obsessed.

Flip through any men's "fitness" magazine these days and you might as well be reading Cosmo or Vogue. Half the articles are about dieting, cosmetic products, or "how to make her beg for more."

No one has a greater respect for health and fitness than me (I'm 38, still run a 6-minute mile, lift as much weight as I could when I was 20, and have never been over 10% bodyfat in my life), but enough is enough! Like John said, the point of being healthy and fit is to make your life more enjoyable, not to win some phantom beauty contest.

Building muscle and staying fit is a great thing, but when it becomes an obsession it borders on a mental disorder. Eat right, train regularly and intensely, and enjoy life!

Exactly! I'm glad you liked the update, I appreciate the feedback.

I'll be the first to admit that when a big transformation is in the works, an extreme amount of dedication can be very helpful (it worked for me!) However, unless you are a body builder or athlete training for a specific purpose, there has to come a time when a more reasonable balance is struck. Over time, I finally reached that point. I've found that I enjoy my health more than ever now that I've finally let go of the unrealistic notion that I need to be "perfect" all the time.

I think it's something that a person needs to tweak over and over. I was literally obsessed with my physique when I started, back at 16 (11 years ago). It worked for me, and I'm glad I did it. It was my pastime and hobby and I made great gains from it.

Over the years my interest has just gone up and down, but the best gains come when you are dedicated, bordering on obsession. I'm currently on the high-end of dedication (my wife said it was a mild obsession, but I told her one's obsession is another's dedication, and yes compared to people who do nothing I'd seem like an insane lunatic, but to people who do more than me I'm a sloth).

I'd say if it's only giving a positive addition to your life and not screwing other things up, you're good. I still have cheat days and eat out. A friend of mine once skipped his dad's birthday cake because he couldn't afford the calories and I considered that over the top.

In regards to magazines/media, hot/ugly is more visible in the past but I don't know how much the average joe is really doing that he wasn't years ago. As a whole I'd say our society is uglier now than it's been in the past if only because 2/3 of the population is overweight. I can't believe that a person who looks like most people do is terribly obsessed with his appearance. At least on the surface, however, our society seems more vain than before because we are baraged by hotness and celebs.

John, I found your message of the day today to be a breath of rationale air in an atmosphere of ever-increasing body obsessiveness.

I've been thinking a lot lately about how out of control our culture's body perfection obsession has become in the last few years. It used to be primarily women who were subjected to this multimedia barrage inciting them to strive for the perfect body at all costs, but now men are being told that they too should be just as obsessed.

Flip through any men's "fitness" magazine these days and you might as well be reading Cosmo or Vogue. Half the articles are about dieting, cosmetic products, or "how to make her beg for more."

No one has a greater respect for health and fitness than me (I'm 38, still run a 6-minute mile, lift as much weight as I could when I was 20, and have never been over 10% bodyfat in my life), but enough is enough! Like John said, the point of being healthy and fit is to make your life more enjoyable, not to win some phantom beauty contest.

Building muscle and staying fit is a great thing, but when it becomes an obsession it borders on a mental disorder. Eat right, train regularly and intensely, and enjoy life!

Very well said. I think a certain amount of obsession is beneficial in reaching certain goals. But once you are there, most people should be able to maintain whatever they've achieved with a more relaxed approach. If not, perhaps the goal's not appropriate. (I didn't see the article. I'm gonna look for it now).

My point, and I believe the one John's message made originally, is to what end are those of us who allow dedication to become obsession doing this? Are you competing, modeling, or otherwise earning a living from your body's appearance? If not, then why be so hung up on the looks aspect of it all?

Again, I'm speaking as someone who has always been very fit and has often been accused of being obsessively so myself (I'm certainly not immune to the attitude-shaping influences I'm criticizing). So I'm definitely not knocking intense dedication. But believing that getting your bodyfat down to 5 percent (I've been there), is going to change your life is a pipe dream.

If you cannot allow your size, weight and strength to fluctuate (within respectable parameters) from time to time, you need to take a good, hard look at what's motivating your quest. Is it to be physically perfect? (You never will be.) Is it to make people admire you? (This sort of external validation is a slippery slope, resulting in a constant dread of losing that tenous admiration, and what you've come to see as your identity.) Is it to look like the cover model on Men's Health? (That guy's getting a hell of a big payday for the sacrifices he's made to look like that. What are you getting?)

Working out, running and athletics are definitely among the things I most enjoy in my life. But when we start doing those things in a futile attempt to achieve and maintain an ideal created by Hollywood, Madision Avenue, and countless vanity mags, we've lost sight of the real point. And, worse, we've lost control of our own self worth. Unfortunately, women have been the victims of this kind of brainwashing for many years. Now, it appears, men are ripe for the picking as well.

It kind of reminded me of what I posted in my picture thread the other day:

It's not that I don't train as hard, I'm just not as gung-ho about it as I used to be. I've learned to balance my eating habits and my efforts in the gym into something that I hope I can maintain for a lifetime. I've seen too many exercisers push too hard for too long and get burned out. It's all about balance.

Take right now for example - I enjoy riding my road bike. I challenge myself day in and day out. After a while, I'll probably get sick of it and take up something else.

I only lift three days a week now. I've found a lot of training to be extraneous and unecessary. And it's not because I have good genetics; I don't. I've just learned what works for my body, and that should be the most important goal of any health minded individual.

Think long term.

:tu:

My point, and I believe the one John's message made originally, is to what end are those of us who allow dedication to become obsession doing this? Are you competing, modeling, or otherwise earning a living from your body's appearance? If not, then why be so hung up on the looks aspect of it all?

Again, I'm speaking as someone who has always been very fit and has often been accused of being obsessively so myself (I'm certainly not immune to the attitude-shaping influences I'm criticizing). So I'm definitely not knocking intense dedication. But believing that getting your bodyfat down to 5 percent (I've been there), is going to change your life is a pipe dream.

If you cannot allow your size, weight and strength to fluctuate (within respectable parameters) from time to time, you need to take a good, hard look at what's motivating your quest. Is it to be physically perfect? (You never will be.) Is it to make people admire you? (This sort of external validation is a slippery slope, resulting in a constant dread of losing that tenous admiration, and what you've come to see as your identity.) Is it to look like the cover model on Men's Health? (That guy's getting a hell of a big payday for the sacrifices he's made to look like that. What are you getting?)

Working out, running and athletics are definitely among the things I most enjoy in my life. But when we start doing those things in a futile attempt to achieve and maintain an ideal created by Hollywood, Madision Avenue, and countless vanity mags, we've lost sight of the real point. And, worse, we've lost control of our own self worth. Unfortunately, women have been the victims of this kind of brainwashing for many years. Now, it appears, men are ripe for the picking as well. :claphigh:

I am sure John wouldn't have made the changes he did if he wasn't "obsessed" at the beginning. Otherwise he would have quit and he and others would be less because of a lack of obsession.

Once a level is reached, it is time to back off and maintain a balanced view of life and body. But as a guy that has been around long enough to be most of the readers' father, let me say be aware the "balanced" life doesn't allow you to fall back to the conditions that surrounded you at the depths of your fitness and health. Once you have climbed a mountain, it is easy to fall back down the slopes if you don't maintain a hold.

Gah! once again, someone used the obsessed word! so I'll say it again!

"OBSESSED IS WHAT THE LAZY USE TO DESCRIBE THE DEDICATED"

now believe that!! :cool:


but unfortunately us fat folks in houston dont buy into that obsession which is why we're ONCE AGAIN! the fattest city in america! :tu:



Adam

Adam, that "fattest city" label for Houston is pure bull crap. But I do agree with your point about "different strokes," where one person's dedication is another's obsession, and the relation of laziness to either.

I, too, found John's remarks of today most timely. Also, well spake, rtestes! (and BTW a belated happy birthday!) For me, one hard part of "climbing the mountain" is determining when I am truly at the summit, or at "a" summit that is "OK" to me, to live at.

For example, at a current weight of around 215 pounds, down from over 250, I am at a point where I am questioning: am I being realistic to think I have as many more pounds to trim off as seems "correct" to me now? How much more am I going to change my life, and keep it changed, whether or not I make whatever goal I set? Am I on the verge of obsessing over any unrealistic goal?

It all comes down to, "What do I want to fit in my life?" That is, what will mark my lifestyle of eating and exercise for the rest of my life, that starkly and permanently contrasts with my lifestyle before I changed? What are, or will be, my new norms? What further changes shall I make and keep? And how will my body respond to those? What will my "transformed steady-state" stats of weight, bodyfat %, strength etc. be? And can I live at peace with those stats?

I absolutely agree that maintaining is even harder than "climbing." I have too much experience as a yo-yo dieter, and on-and-off exerciser, to ever forget that I have never before succeeded longer than six months in maintaining good habits regarding eating and exercise. Because of my past, I will always - ALWAYS - feel as if I am on a "slippery slope," no matter how tightly, and for how long, I have held my position on any mountain. I am "chronically vulnerable."

My "Danger Will Robinson" conditions and indicators will not necessarily be the same as another person's. John Stone can take two weeks off, and bounce back. I cannot be so sure the same would work for me. I expect to have to keep watching my eating carefully, and continuing some degree of "working out," even on short breaks, but especially on long vacations. Heck, I just ate at restaurants the past 3 nights, and that alone was enough to shake me severely enough to ask myself the question I must continually be ready to ask: "Am I dedicated, or not?" I know what I mean when I ask myself that question; it's that "inner conversation" that an individual typically cannot explain to others. It's my "ultimate self-confrontation."

Well, I rambled and ranted alot here, but I hope it's made some contribution that helps at least one other member.

Remember that it was comments about John's supposed loss of muscle that sparked his update, not concern that he's getting fat or slipping back into an unhealthy lifestyle. I commend him again for having the fortitude to say, "Hey, I'm okay with that," rather than freaking out because he's not living up to other people's ideals. THAT is the confidence of someone who establishes his own goals and knows how to reach them. Again, I find that kind of perspective refreshing.

I have to agree with all you've guys said. I'm getting back into shape because I've really needed to and it feels darn good. I know you guys will agree with me on that one. But I don't want to be like one of my classmates at school who is 16 and completely ripped, but he spends so much time working out and exercising that I wonder if there is more to his world than that. I personally see weight lifting and exercising as ways to maintain ourselves and keep ourselves in good health, not as our live's only objective and singular activity.

There's more to life than exercise.

I will admit that I am obsessed with fitness and appearance and I probably always will be. Will there eventually be a point where I am completely satisfied? Maybe, but at this point it is a long way off. A lot of it is probably due to the media and a lot of it has to do with the people I hang out with. I dont see it as a negative thing. Its like any other challenge in my life (ie work, school, etc.) and I get satisfaction from moving forward, and from getting myself back up when I fall down.

Once a level is reached, it is time to back off and maintain a balanced view of life and body. But as a guy that has been around long enough to be most of the readers' father, let me say be aware the "balanced" life doesn't allow you to fall back to the conditions that surrounded you at the depths of your fitness and health. Once you have climbed a mountain, it is easy to fall back down the slopes if you don't maintain a hold.
Motivating post! Well at least for me :lol:

:tu: