I suppose this is the place to talk about this.I recently went to a bday party. This party was of my bf's friends so I wasn't really at ease. And so I begin to observe people and their behaviour, in a scientific way (not psycho way :D )
I was so confused with some people there. It was like a good looking girl even if just skinny not fit can do whatever she wants and everyone's ok with it. One of the girls there just did what the good looking girl told her to and she was always acting inferior just because she was more chubby and less beautiful. And I thought about it a long time:is it true that good looking girls or boys have some kind of power over others?
I know some of the girls there (the good looking ones) and despite their beauty and being skinny (not eating at all or eating and inducing vomite) they aren't cool people (I'm not trying to be mean it just a fact they act like their superior and tings like that). But the others (boys and girls) act like they are their bosses. I don't know if that was so clear to me because I'm not a part of the group.
So what I want to know is: is this true or was just something happened in this particular case?

i think its a case of people who are confident and those who arent. Those who are, sometimes dont realise they are influencing others who aren't, and those who aren't, dont realise they are being influenced, are. :lol: hope someone out there understood that.

Bizarrely enough we talked about this exact topic last night in my Organizational Behavior class. What you're talking about is referred to as Referent Power. Essentially, its the power of charisma.

The answer is yes, absolutely, attractive people have power over other people. Its only effective if the 'follower' allows them to influence them, however, so its not universal. But an interesting thing about referent power is that the person being influenced oftentimes feels a special benefit by riding the coattails of the leader. For instance, have you ever seen the entourage of people surrounding famous rock stars? Those people are able to use the fact that they're in the presence of someone with a great deal of charisma to basically boost their position as well.

In the end, attractive people (especially women) receive more for less, get paid more than their unattractive counterparts, have more opportunity for promotion and more opportunities for more experiences.

Dave (just deals out a solid hand of truth)

I suppose this is the place to talk about this.I recently went to a bday party. This party was of my bf's friends so I wasn't really at ease. And so I begin to observe people and their behaviour, in a scientific way (not psycho way :D )
I was so confused with some people there. It was like a good looking girl even if just skinny not fit can do whatever she wants and everyone's ok with it. One of the girls there just did what the good looking girl told her to and she was always acting inferior just because she was more chubby and less beautiful. And I thought about it a long time:is it true that good looking girls or boys have some kind of power over others?
I know some of the girls there (the good looking ones) and despite their beauty and being skinny (not eating at all or eating and inducing vomite) they aren't cool people (I'm not trying to be mean it just a fact they act like their superior and tings like that). But the others (boys and girls) act like they are their bosses. I don't know if that was so clear to me because I'm not a part of the group.
So what I want to know is: is this true or was just something happened in this particular case?

it's not your imagination... unfortunately our society today puts so much emphasis on looking good (ie - being skinny) that a lot of skinny people feel they are 'better' than everyone else... this is a bad attitude but unfortunately it happens... and on the opposite end are the normal or slightly over weight people that feel they are not as good as the others because they aren't as skinny... it's not a fitness thing, it's a skinny thing... they think they are better than others because they have the 'runway model I'm going to blow away in the next breeze' look... the only explanation I can think of for the inferiority complex of the normal looking girls is that they also think that the 'ideal' HAH look is better and they feel as though they don't measure up... it's a self confidence issue more than anything... when I was in high school I had pretty low self esteem, partly because my mom was always telling me I was getting fat (when in fact I was pretty normal)... I had always been a stick figure until I hit puberty though, so as soon as I started to get feminine curves, I was getting fat... I realize now that it was my mom's own insecurity that was talking there, because she didn't (and still doesn't) have many of those curves herself... but now that I don't equate my figure with my self worth I'm over that crisis of self consiousness... those girls will hopefully grow out of their attitudes, on both sides and become more rounded people...at least we can hope :p

Society does treat attractive people better. It's a fact of life. Whether the person is overweight, has bad hair, a big nose, no chin, or whatever, people will judge you based on how you look. My friends have put up with some annoying girls for too long just because they're slender. To me, there's two rules:

1. Always determine someone's personality before you judge them

2. Demand that others do the same to do. Anyone who doesn't isn't worth the time

That's why sports are such a great social environment. Sure, in cocktail party status-seeking, the pretty people can beat the fit people, but in basketball, not so much.

And, of course, there's a big overlap between pretty people and fit people, although newly fit people often take a little while to step into their newfound power.

Your eyes haven't deceived you. What you've witnessed is all too commonplace in society. Attractive people definitely have command over those who aren't as attractive. They have a higher self-concept which in turn gives them more confidence, and believe me, it's not hard to tell when someone is confident. People notice confidence and admire it and often times even gravitate toward the people who posses it. Attractive people get better service, they get approached more frequently in stores by employees asking shoppers if they need help, and they also get unseen advantages as well because they make a psychological impact on people too.

Just remember, the people that succumb to the good looks of others and put precedence on appearance over personality aren't people you need to give two-shits about anyway. Let the followers follow. :claphigh:

What always confuses me is what is considered "attractive". Beauty is in the eye of the beholder! Of course, if your face is completely symmetrical, you will be considered more attractive than some others. But all in all, I think it's based on confidence. I've seen some people who I have found totally unattractive, yet they think they are the hottest things on earth and have confidence up the wazoo, so they do (somehow) have their followers. On the other hand, there are some very attractive, insecure people who are consistently getting picked on. The only way you can let other people make you feel inferior is when you give them permission. If you act pretty, than you're pretty.

It's funny. Plenty of my guy friends hate it when they get set up with girls who have "a great personality". Somehow that means that the girl is not good looking. But I find that it's the personality that makes a person more attractive! Am I crazy?

What always confuses me is what is considered "attractive". Beauty is in the eye of the beholder! Of course, if your face is completely symmetrical, you will be considered more attractive than some others. But all in all, I think it's based on confidence. I've seen some people who I have found totally unattractive, yet they think they are the hottest things on earth and have confidence up the wazoo, so they do (somehow) have their followers. On the other hand, there are some very attractive, insecure people who are consistently getting picked on. The only way you can let other people make you feel inferior is when you give them permission. If you act pretty, than you're pretty.

It's funny. Plenty of my guy friends hate it when they get set up with girls who have "a great personality". Somehow that means that the girl is not good looking. But I find that it's the personality that makes a person more attractive! Am I crazy?

Not at all! As I mentioned, confidence plays a big role in your personality. I've met several unattractive individuals who because of their confidence and personality are well liked and respected. Looks aren't everything and I apologize if that's what my message communicated.

It's true about Referent behavior.

However, confidence will also get you quite far, as well as an likeable personality.

I, for one, have to rely on confidence and my personality to get me further than most drop dead gorgeous people. I am at a huge disadvantage when it comes to first impressions against them. However, I don't worry about it. I know that in the end, if I tried my darned hardest and people failed to look past the physical and not notice me, I'm not worried. I tried.

It hurts sometimes, and yes, that's part of rejection. However, it's not the end of the world. With 3 billion+ people out there, if I can get my small circle of people to like me, I'm happy with that. I don't need to please everybody, and just knowing that, increased my confidence and personal happiness 10 fold.

Good luck to you, and don't sweat the lil stuff. It does suck, but it's just part of life. The sooner you recognize how people are and correct your behavior so as not to be outrightly affected by by something unchangable, the better off you'll be.

Referent behaviour... "I love psychology!" :)

Just to add something about these thread, I think behaviour is far more important than look. I mean, for first impression, if you're good looking, then you may have an advantage, but with a bad attitude, I bet people will despice you in the near future.

On the other hand, if you're not that good looking but with a beautiful attitude, even though you have disadvantage on you first impression, people will love you more once they know you better. I think this is better rather than the first one :tu:

There of course was a study done by 20/20 (i think) that sent an attractive person vs. an avg person to the same job interview or shopping.

In regards to the job interview - the resumes were virtually the same but the unattractive one had something better on it.

Anyways - in most cases the attractive person got the job - got helped sooner at the supermarket -etc.

It begins in junior high realy when the pier groups assemble. It's quite said. I wonder if this more of a US thing or global phenom?

I don't think this is just a US phenomenon, nor do I think this is an unjust construct that can be eliminated through education and raising our children well, like other forms of prejudice. You can change the shades of what "attractive" can mean, but I don't think you're going to be successful in convincing everybody not to pay more attention to people to whom they are attracted. That's what "attracted" means.

Changing the social game so that attractive people no longer draw disproportionate attention is like changing the physical game so that you don't have to look up to look tall people in the eye. By which I mean that people generally think wearing fancy shoes solves both problems.

But the thing that is true in America is that if you're in even a modicum of good shape and you're over the age of 22, you're way above average in attractiveness in most places. Yeah, the system isn't based on merit or hard work in concept, but because so many people just hand away their power voluntarily, you can make great leaps forward and upward just by putting in a little work.

Sure, it can be frustrating, but it's not like you can't do anything about it. Learn the system and work the system. It can definitely be adjusted to your advantage more easily than you think.

Also, attractiveness and beauty are not the same thing. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and there is a great deal of complicated, systematic theory associated with developing a refined sense for beauty. Attractiveness is simpler, more basic, and generally more universalizeable. Not all attractive people are all that pretty, let alone beautiful. And there are a lot of otherwise ugly people, inside and out, who are attractive because of the way they carry themselves and how they use their bodies, eyes, and voices.

Learn the system and work the system.

But the thing that is true in America is that if you're in even a modicum of good shape and you're over the age of 22, you're way above average in attractiveness in most places.
I think we should all get out more :D

Here's a little tidbit that was on aol today:

Attractive People Make More Money
It pays to be tall, dark and handsome... literally. A report by the Federal Reserve Bank of St. Louis suggests that good-looking people tend to earn higher salaries and get promoted more often than those with average looks.
When compared to the averages:
· Attractive people earned 5 percent more.
· Overweight women earned 17 percent less.
· Taller people earned 2.6 percent more.
· Less attractive people earned 9 percent less